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Humpty Dumpty
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Humpty Dumpty Is a pathetic piece of trash
 
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Exclamation May 08, 2019 at 03:03 AM
  #1
I guess im weird in the fact that I don't keep up with when the last time I cut was. I can't tell you to the month and day of when the last time I cut was. I can tell you that it was around a year ago. Since then I have felt with my Dad having a serious injury that could have killed him. I didn't cut during that. My mother in-law died late January. While dealing with everything that comes with that I didn't cut. Yet not a single day passed that I didn't want to.

Now it has been about year and I finally gave in today. It was only superficial, but it felt so good. The relief it brought me. Why did I give in today? What triggered me to cut after all this time? This is going to sound dumb, but I got a promotion at work. "Wait that's a good thing right?" Yes. Yes it is. It's a real good thing. I was very excited about it. And that's where the problem is.

I try hard to control my emotions. I try not to get too happy, excited, angry, or sad (that one is the hardest for me). I was getting to excited and wasn't able to get it under control and cutting helped with that. It helped calm me down.

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Default May 08, 2019 at 12:35 PM
  #2
I'm sorry that you hurt yourself, but I do understand. Sometimes when things are going too well, that's a trigger for SH too. I understand about the SH calming you down. That makes sense. It's like the one size fits all coping mechanism. If you're too up, it helps you get down. If you're too down, it helps you get up. Too bad it's a harmful coping mechanism, otherwise it would be perfect. Congrats on the year of no SH though. That's great, and congrats on the promotion at work, that's great too! HUGS Kit

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Default May 08, 2019 at 01:36 PM
  #3
Regardless of the associated upset, congratulations on your promotion, Humpty Dumpty.
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Default May 08, 2019 at 10:22 PM
  #4
I also don't find it helpful to keep track of exactly when the last time was. I just know it was about several weeks ago and before that many months. I agree with what SlumberKitty said about it being a general coping mechanism. I feel like for those of us that self harm it's always in the front of our minds as a go to coping strategy. But honestly congrats on going so long without it. It sounds like you've had a hard year. And congrats on the promotion too!
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Default May 10, 2019 at 09:48 AM
  #5
((((((((( Humpty Dumpty )))))))))

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