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never. happy
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never. happy Whenever God closes a door, he makes sure my fingers are in it
 
Member Since: May 2015
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Default May 25, 2019 at 10:39 AM
  #1
I've flunked an exam that I was supposed to pass 2 years ago. It's frustrating that the marks I score are kind of in a pattern like 25, 27, 35, 37 and so on for the other exams I've written and failed. My mom is furious with me and whatever I try to say to make her understand, she says is an excuse.

She said angrily, "live off your father till he dies and then let's see what to do from there". And I hate my dad enough to desperately do anything to avoid his assistance, which he keeps pushing on me even if I can do it myself. I have no confidence and hope whatsoever. But I fail Everytime. I was mad enough at him to try to kill myself three times out of many more in 4 years ago.But I've failed Everytime. Therapy? Nope. They don't believe in that kinda stuff. And we don't really have that kinda money either. And my mom believes that all this is tied to my weight.

I know that my family could get hurt by this, but it's like ripping off a band-aid. It'll be really painful at first, but then you realize the importance and relief of the band-aid being gone.

So, after they sleep tonight, I will try to no longer depend on anyone; Because I will try to no longer exist. I hope I have the courage to do it all the way this time.

Last edited by never. happy; May 25, 2019 at 11:41 AM..
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Default May 25, 2019 at 02:47 PM
  #2
hope you are able to stay safe.

(I see you are online as I'mm typing, how are you doing?)
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possum220
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Default May 25, 2019 at 07:08 PM
  #3
No matter how much some of us study it is hard to absorb written material. I have failed exams even when I tried my best. Turns out that I have some kind of learning disability.

I am sorry that your Mum is so very hard on you. Her expectations should not define you. You are young. You will, if you are not successful tonight, find a way of being in this world.
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SlumberKitty
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Default May 28, 2019 at 02:18 PM
  #4
HUGS. I hope you are feeling better. Kit

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