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Default Apr 27, 2019 at 05:01 AM
  #1
Kids and grandkid don’t live close and too far to travel. So many problems - health, money and just no one.
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Default Apr 27, 2019 at 05:03 AM
  #2
Been up half the night wondering what I have going for me.....not much.
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Default Apr 27, 2019 at 05:04 AM
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If I could find just one person to talk to, but I rarely go out.
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Default Apr 27, 2019 at 07:14 AM
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Well, now you have us too.
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Default Apr 27, 2019 at 08:02 AM
  #5
Hello Martha! Welcome to Psych Central! I get scared sometimes too and feel alone even with one brother just down the road. I have a disabled son that lives with me and I worry how he will manage when I'm gone. It's no fun getting old! Hugs!

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Default Apr 27, 2019 at 08:55 AM
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Thank you, unaluna and IowaFarmGal and hugs to both of you! I've been awake since the middle of the night when panic attack set in. Been trying to get some things done, but it is SO hard! All I would really like to do on this gorgeous day is sit, but I have been checking back on this website hoping that someone would reply and help me get motivated to do something.
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Default Apr 27, 2019 at 10:24 AM
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Is it a gorgeous day there? We have snow in April! 3-7 inches they're saying! Are you near the beach? I haven't been to the ocean in a long time. I miss the sound of the waves now that I live up north again.

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Default Apr 27, 2019 at 10:38 AM
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IowaFarmGal:
I do live by the water. I can see the water from my driveway. Sometimes, it is in my driveway and backyard during hurricanes.
But, it is a gorgeous day here today. Unfortunately, I don't really feel like enjoying it.
Isn't it amazing how everything in life comes crashing down on you at once, like a ton of bricks?
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Smile Apr 27, 2019 at 02:25 PM
  #9
I don't think I really have anything useful to add here. But wanted to leave just a brief reply letting you know I read your post... & I wish you well...

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Default Apr 27, 2019 at 03:47 PM
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Thank you, Skeezyks.
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Default Apr 27, 2019 at 06:42 PM
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You live right on the beach? Is the sound soothing for you? I used to like going to the pier and listening to the waves. Quite often it was in the evening and the wind was chilly blowing in. I volunteer at the Senior Center in town. They have card groups, and a quilting group, and a group of ladies that go to the pool together to work out and then share a pot luck breakfast. We used to serve breakfast and lunch but breakfast was cancelled a while back. Is there a Senior Center in your town? It would be a place to meet people.

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Default Apr 28, 2019 at 08:47 AM
  #12
Hi, Martha, and welcome!
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Default Apr 29, 2019 at 06:32 AM
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Thank you, Travelinglady.
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Default Apr 29, 2019 at 06:54 AM
  #14
IowaFarmGal
I don't live on the beach, but by a tributary (bayou) to the greater gulf - so, no beach, no waves right by where I live. I do live within a mile of the beach. It is lovely, but there are too many tourists, too many casinos (which I don't frequent), too much traffic. This used to be a sleepy little fishing town - quiet, friendly. It isn't any more. Maybe I have lived too long in one place. All of my neighbors are from other parts of the country, and I am the lone person who was born here, went to college here, married here, worked here, had a family here and still live HERE.
I was a senior center director in my working career. It is just not my thing. I mean I enjoyed it when I wasn't a senior. LOL But, bingo and group shopping trips or exercise groups are not high on my priority list.
I think my current depression and anxiety stem from my knee injury (six weeks ago tomorrow) which left me in great pain and on crutches. It would have been ok, but I live by myself and could not just sit and have someone (the nonexistent someone) cook for me or help me with things; so, that has extended my recovery time.
My philosophy throughout my life has been, "Life is a biotch, and then you die." I've enjoyed it, but this getting old without the energy and with injuries and pain is not what I was expecting. LOL Struggle is a part of life. Everyone deals with their own as best they can. I know that I have, but it has been a long road. I was hoping for something easier now that my kids are grown, married and successful, but life just keeps getting harder and harder. I used to laugh a lot. My kids would say that they could recognize me in a crowded store by my laughter. I don't laugh anymore. With all 4 of my siblings and my best friend dying within the last 10 years, life has just gotten......what is the purpose anymore?
Ah well, thank you for letting me write my early morning thoughts. If this doesn't get any response, it is ok. I just feel better writing them down. So, maybe that is the purpose of this forum for me....to just write to the unknown world that I am still in it....even if no one acknowledges me....in the real world or the virtual world.
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Default Apr 29, 2019 at 07:02 AM
  #15
Good Morning! Does it help to get it out? The times are depressing in general, but I hope your day goes well anyway.

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Default Apr 29, 2019 at 11:14 AM
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Thanks, IowaFarmGal!
Yes, it does help to just write my thoughts down. Maybe I will start a new topic that asks for just 'early morning thoughts'. Then everyone can just say what is on their mind at the time.
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Default Apr 30, 2019 at 05:15 PM
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Hello Martha! I hope you had a good day. It's gray and rainy here and will be until Friday. My small pension comes tomorrow and I'll be able to get some gas and replace a few supplies I'm out of. I'm afraid the birds will have to wait for their bird seed until Social Security comes. I've been making them oatmeal/berry/peanut butter balls. The squirrel seems to like them too.

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Default May 01, 2019 at 05:25 AM
  #18
IowaFarmGal:
I live in the DEEP South... Daytime temps are in the 80's here. Nighttime temps are in the 70's. It is great for someone who is cold-blooded, but it it too warm for me...and it is only Spring! And, though I have lived here my entire life, the temperatures/humidity have definitely gotten worse. That is what happens when there is too much construction and trees are cut down and replaced with concrete.

I understand about the small pension. I get mine in a few more days.

Have a good day!
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Default May 01, 2019 at 08:22 AM
  #19
Good Morning Martha! I'm heading out to the senior center in a bit. It's another rainy day and I hear there is a Levee breach along the Mississippi river. More rain coming too. Some Spring times are like that. It's not us this year, so I'm glad for that. Did your children move north? You said they are far away. I keep up with family on Facebook but rarely see anyone. I have an invitation to a graduation for my cousin's grandson but I don't know if I'll have enough gas to go. I hope things are going better today and you enjoy your day! I'll be busy catching up laundry and doing errands and grocery shopping. I hear the kettle singing, time to wash up for work! Hugs to you! <3

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Default May 04, 2019 at 09:13 AM
  #20
Hello young lady, 64 is young to me, ha. I just joined this site today and your post was the first I have read. I note one of your followers told you they had several inches of snow to deal with recently. So there ya go, something to be grateful for. You do not have snow to fight with, as we people of the north have to contend with. Bet you It is not as cold in Ocean Springs as it is up north. Another positive! I do not mean to belittle your situation. When we get down we need to try to find a floating piece of wood, anything, to cling to. Anything to get us out of the darkness. Being grateful helps me. I live in Montreal, Canada. Here we freeze our butts, dig ourselves out of lies of snow all winter. Now we are getting spring flooding. I spent last Saturday filling sand bags for our poor neighbors who might lose their houses to the floods, second time in past three years. Like you my lady, they needed help. To know others care. We all need to know others care. You see, another positive. People are reaching out to you to show they care, do not let that log drift on by. Grab it and be grateful. Show how grateful you are by getting dressed and walk down to the water and yell out loud...thank you all you crazy people who live In your snow covered igloos north of me, thank you water for bring me a log to grab onto, and if you swear, yell out loud, ..... you sadness, I am stronger than you. Sorry for long winded cheer leading, but do hope it adds a little positive to your day. Cheers and hugs. SeniorJ
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