I am new here. Hello everyone.

Well, I have been a sex addict for over 30 years. In that time period there have been months/ years of sobriety, and also many months and years where things got completely out of control. I am a 45 y.o. male and I have yet to rid myself of this illusive, insidious, despicable addiction. I am so tired of it. This addiction has cost me relationships, friendships, money, jobs, advancement, and time. Out of all of these the number one thing that it has cost me is time. I am at a loss where to go from here. I am currently seeing a wonderful counselor who is certified in sex addiction. This has been helpful to finally find a therapist who understands how terrible this addiction is and how destructive it can be. I have been to SAA for many years, off and on, consecutively, and sporadically. I have a huge trust issue and its very hard to let people in, even guys from my group who are in the same situation as I am and say that they want to help. I spent the entire day today with internet porn and compulsive masturbation. I am so disgusted with myself right now. Also, I am so tired of this addiction and how it completely alters my day, my month, my year, and my life. I had so many good things in store for today, but I sold them all for a day with my addiction. I don't think this is really helping to talk about my problem in this space, but maybe others in here can relate to what I am saying. There is part of me that wants recovery and part of me that only wants to continue the addiction. I am 45 and I guess I am not done, but I so want to be. I really do. I don't want to be 50 saying the same things that I am saying here at 45. Well, I said the same things in my 20s, 30s, and 40s. Nothing has changed. Oh well, I am not very hopeful that I will ever rid myself of this addiction, but I hold out a very small amount of hope that I won't still be addicted at 50. Thank you all for listening to me ramble and if anyone else in here can relate it would be nice to hear from you. Take care of yourselves and be healthy. - A

Hello A: Well... I have not had the struggle you have. (But I have had my own.) I noticed, however, this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral! I hope you find PC to be of benefit.

One additional forum, here on PC, that may be of interest to you might be the Men-Focused Support forum. Here's a link:

https://forums.psychcentral.com/men-focused-support/

My best wishes to you...

Hi there. I am also new on PC, still waiting on my first post to go up . When you speak I feel what you feel, I feel your pain, frustration, and your hopelessness. I hope that by the end of your journey you will be able to take life on as a new man in control, and hopefully someone here can help you on your journey to recovery. I am a 24 year old married female, quite different from you. Like many others I haven't yet been diagnosed as a sex addict, and I'm desperatel for answers. I have a question... Was your addiction always there, full blown? Or did you gradually progress to the sex addict that you find yourself to be today at 45.

I have been around a few male addicts and it's the same thing as what you described. Have you tried working the steps? Finding a god that works for you. One that you can connect with? It does help. I'm 24 days clean after a few years in active addiction. It's a slow process. And change always is slow. Be gentle with yourself. You can do this!!

Hey!
I just joined this forum as well!

I can definitely relate to you. I think the worst part for me is that I'm not sure how serious it is. I see some very extreme posts here and I've never dwelled into something quite that kinky, but I can't stop thinking of sex. And even if I do have it,I don't feel satisfied even if I orgasm. Just frustrated.

Welcome . Hopefully you'll find hope, support, and answers here. Read through some other threads and find others to relate to, it's very helpful 😊.