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I love my husband
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Trig Oct 29, 2019 at 11:37 PM
  #1
Two days ago I discovered my husband has been engaging in sex-chat websites for hours at a time as long as I’ve known him (5 years). Online, not in person. In any case, a violation of trust. After long conversations, this discovery was compounded by his shocking admission that
Possible trigger:


I can’t even begin to wrap my head around how he feels and how to move forward now. I feel compassion for him, but worry about myself.

I experience general anxiety disorder and have struggled with depression. My mood has plummeted since finding out two days ago.

Has anyone dealt with this. I don’t want to bring this up to ANYONE we know

Last edited by bluekoi; Oct 30, 2019 at 10:53 AM.. Reason: Add triggger icon. Apply trigger code.
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Smile Oct 30, 2019 at 06:36 PM
  #2
Hello I love my husband: Welcome to Psych Central. Thank you for bringing your concern here to PC. I see you also posted this in the Addictions forum where you've received 2 replies so far. However I thought I would write my reply here.

One additional forum, here on PC, that may be of interest to you would be the Relationships & Communication forum. Here's a link:

https://psychcentralforums.com/relat...communication/

And then here's a link to an article, from Psych Central's archives, that discusses the experience of finding your partner using porn or cybersex:

What If You Find Your Partner Using Porn or Cybersex? | Healing Together for Couples

I hope you find PC to be of benefit.

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"I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last)
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I love my husband
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Default Oct 30, 2019 at 07:24 PM
  #3
Thank you.

I didn’t mean to cross-post.

I appreciate the information. It’s already helped guide me through some conversations. I’m not opposed to porn. We have (had, for the moment) a healthy sex life. It’s the secrets and obsessive/addiction angle. And the self-disclosures about past trauma.

And my shock/disgust/anger.
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