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oldman01
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Default Mar 25, 2012 at 06:06 PM
  #21
It does more than turn me on,I'm sayin
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Default Mar 25, 2012 at 08:41 PM
  #22
Good for you. But this is WAY off topic.
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Default Mar 30, 2012 at 01:18 PM
  #23
You folks are an informed group for my question...

My wife has often told me about the romantic feelings she had for another woman before we met. She doesn't think it is common for woman with similar experiences to share that info with their husbands but I think it is very common. What do you all think? They share or keep it secret?
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Default Mar 30, 2012 at 03:44 PM
  #24
I've never been married, but it's one of the first topics we discuss when I'm dating.
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Default Apr 01, 2012 at 12:37 AM
  #25
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Originally Posted by bighands View Post
You folks are an informed group for my question...

My wife has often told me about the romantic feelings she had for another woman before we met. She doesn't think it is common for woman with similar experiences to share that info with their husbands but I think it is very common. What do you all think? They share or keep it secret?
I am committed to my H, but we "scope chicks" together. I talk about it being hard because I crave a woman at times, but I'm committed to him only, MY choice. I've cheated in the past and I'm not going to do that again.

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Default Apr 02, 2012 at 10:11 AM
  #26
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I am committed to my H, but we "scope chicks" together. I talk about it being hard because I crave a woman at times, but I'm committed to him only, MY choice. I've cheated in the past and I'm not going to do that again.
So, do you consider yourself happily married? This is what scares me sometimes. She swears to me that she is committed to our monogamous relationship but I fear her same "cravings" will get the best of her and won't be satisfied by fantasy anymore. I fear that her impulsiveness will cause her to lose perspective of what is at the core of her current happy life.

I never really worried in the past until this "ex" came back into the picture big-time via social media.
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Default Apr 02, 2012 at 01:40 PM
  #27
Curious. Were the cravings so overwhelming that you needed to cheat or was there a problem in your marriage and the encounter was the result?
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Default Apr 29, 2012 at 09:50 AM
  #28
I'm bi, but as already mentioned by others, I'm in a commited relationship with a woman and to me thats all that matters. I'm comfortable enough with who I am that I don't feel the need to stray, or act on my desires. I'm very satisfied with my girlfriend and she has been 100% accepting of my bisexuality. In fact, I've been a bit of an idiot in the past and she's been amazing with me. I'm very lucky to be in such a good position.
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Default Apr 29, 2012 at 02:35 PM
  #29
So, my question to those of you who are bi but in a committed relationship...

Do you have close friendships with former lovers of yours of the opposite sex of your current partner? If the answer is "yes", how does your current partner deal with it? I've never been the jealous type and my wife has never cheated, that I know of. But some recent behavior and new secretiveness has gotten my very paranoid.

Thoughts?
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Default Apr 29, 2012 at 03:14 PM
  #30
I've never quite understood the whole "bi-sexual" issue, however, I can imagine the emotional warfare it produces. I hope you find peace as you grapple with this issue.
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Default Apr 29, 2012 at 10:47 PM
  #31
I still don't understand why this is such a huge issue for some people...

If you're dating a man, you're with him and that's all that matters. If you're dating a woman, you're with her and that's all that matters. People make it so complicated but it really isn't.
Bi = the person you date might be female, or the person you date might be male. That's all it means...
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Default May 06, 2012 at 12:04 PM
  #32
I am Bisexual and have been married for 24 years. Sure, I fantasize about women, but to me, it's not what's between the legs that count, it's what's between their ears.

My husband allows me to join dating sites in order to fulfill my women attraction.

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Default May 07, 2012 at 07:58 PM
  #33
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I am Bisexual and have been married for 24 years. Sure, I fantasize about women, but to me, it's not what's between the legs that count, it's what's between their ears.

My husband allows me to join dating sites in order to fulfill my women attraction.
Do you actually meet women through the site or just "window shop"?
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Default May 07, 2012 at 09:25 PM
  #34
I am a bi-sexual......But I have to say that when I am in a relationship ( regardless if man or with woman ) .... I am very monogamous....Although I may fantasize about the other sex.....
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Default May 08, 2012 at 09:20 AM
  #35
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I still don't understand why this is such a huge issue for some people...

If you're dating a man, you're with him and that's all that matters. If you're dating a woman, you're with her and that's all that matters. People make it so complicated but it really isn't.
Bi = the person you date might be female, or the person you date might be male. That's all it means...
Nemo, I'm glad that it's such a black-n-white issue for you. But it isn't for everyone. It's human nature to be insecure about the things/people we love most. We have fears of losing them.

Try to see it from someone else eyes. You're in a rough patch (and every couple has them). Your significant other has a VERY close relationship with someone who he/she once loved. Now throw into the picture the extra fact that he/she has not had a romantic relationship with someone of that sex for many years but has always had raging fantasies about that. These fantasies have even been encouraged and shared by you...

The rough times, the close friendship, the history and the perceived opportunity to make real those sexual fantasies that have only been pretend for so long are ganging up on your insecurities. Then add the fact that your significant other has clinical depression and no appetite for sex with you...

Please, tell me again that it shouldn't be such a big issue because I reaaaaaallllllyyyy need to hear it right now.
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Default May 08, 2012 at 11:40 AM
  #36
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Do you actually meet women through the site or just "window shop"?
I have joined online dating sites, yes, but I have not found anyone compatible to me yet. I have just joined 2 more sites. The problems always is that they are just too far away from me, and I am looking for real life situations, not cyber.

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Default May 08, 2012 at 01:55 PM
  #37
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I have joined online dating sites, yes, but I have not found anyone compatible to me yet. I have just joined 2 more sites. The problems always is that they are just too far away from me, and I am looking for real life situations, not cyber.
So, you guys have an open marriage?
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Default May 10, 2012 at 05:31 PM
  #38
No, we absolutely do not have an open marriage. He is just not threatened with me going with a woman sexually because I love him and would never leave him, and he knows this.

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Default May 10, 2012 at 08:27 PM
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Default Aug 27, 2012 at 08:10 PM
  #40
I can offer a totally different perspective on this. I'm 42, my wife is 39, and we have been together for 18 years...married 13 years. We have 3 children. My wife is bi-sexual. I knew this before we got married. My wife has always had a girlfriend, and they have always been long term relationships. Her current girlfriend of 8 years is also married. This has never been a problem in our marriage. I know she will never leave me. I have no insecurities about this. My wife feels a need to be with both sexes and I have no problem giving her this indulgence.

It is a very private part of her life and very few people know. I do not brag about it to my friends. Those who do know have asked all the questions. I do not like the term "open marraige" because our marraige is not open for anyone to come and go as they please. There is no free for all sex thing happening. I've been asked what will we tell the kids? To me this is a stupid question....We would not discuss our ordinary sex life with our kids....why is the world would we ever feel the need to discuss this with them. It's not like their mom is making out with another woman on the couch in front of them. My wife shows no more affection towards her girlfriend outside the bedroom than she does to any other close friend and vice versa....it is private.

I must say that I do enjoy watching two women together...it's hot....the fact that one is my wife and I can join in if i choose is even hotter. I only have sex with my wife because I have no desire to be with another woman. Been there, done that. My wife is hot and I am sexually attracted to her and her only. My wife's girlfriend and her husband also have the same arrangement. I never worry if my wife is going to be with him because she has no desire to be with another man.

This is our arrangement and it works for us. I have seen others try and it fall apart. We have been together for a long time...so for us....we must be doing something right.

Sorry I was so long winded...it just kinda bothers me when people think that monogamous is the only way to be. I see monogamous relationships break up every day. Everyone has to find and do what works and is right for them. Just offering a different perspective.
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