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Post Feb 21, 2013 at 09:03 PM
  #1
I'm new to the LGBT community. I am newly accepting my bisexuality. I have known it for a while but not accepted it. I have buried it for a long time. My problem is bisexuality is against my religious beliefs so I have chosen chastity as difficult as that may be.
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Default Feb 21, 2013 at 09:22 PM
  #2
Melissa, you need to accept what is best for you. I know people who have made the same choice. At the risk of making myself unpopular on this forum (too late!), if you can get involved with a man and then marry, then that would work out for the best, given your religious beliefs.
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Default Feb 22, 2013 at 12:33 AM
  #3
Quote:
Originally Posted by MELISSSAD81 View Post
I'm new to the LGBT community. I am newly accepting my bisexuality. I have known it for a while but not accepted it. I have buried it for a long time. My problem is bisexuality is against my religious beliefs so I have chosen chastity as difficult as that may be.
1) I do not get your choosing chastity while being bisexual. If you are BI, you can at least be with men, so why choose chastity? It is a weird choice, given your circumstances.

2) If you need to be anchored by a religion, and I know that some people do, and it is fine, I would look into alternative denominations that accept bisexuality. Have you done that?
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Default Feb 22, 2013 at 09:24 AM
  #4
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Originally Posted by hamster-bamster View Post
1) I do not get your choosing chastity while being bisexual. If you are BI, you can at least be with men, so why choose chastity? It is a weird choice, given your circumstances.

2) If you need to be anchored by a religion, and I know that some people do, and it is fine, I would look into alternative denominations that accept bisexuality. Have you done that?
Have not found a man I want to be with as of yet that is why I choose chastity for now. It may be odd to some but it makes sense to me. I choose to remain chaste until I am married.

I have not looked into alternative denominations as I feel this where I am being led to be for now.
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Default Feb 22, 2013 at 02:25 PM
  #5
I really support your determination and commitment. Being in a married relationship is ideal. For me I think that is God's design. I did have a pretty rocky time getting there.
Sexual desire is a complex issue. I do not believe that ones sexual desires can be so easily pigeon holed as they are in the popular media. We span a broad range of "sexuality" and "desire", not just 2 or 3 categories. Most things in our world are on encompass a broad range. Furthermore we change over time
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Default Feb 22, 2013 at 08:24 PM
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Have not found a man I want to be with as of yet that is why I choose chastity for now.
That is not chastity. That is ISO.

chas·ti·ty
/ˈCHastətē/
Noun
The state or practice of refraining from sexual intercourse.

You are not refraining from sexual intercourse. You simply do not have a fitting partner for that intercourse. When you find a fitting partner, you will have intercourse with him.

Chastity is having 5 outstanding and accomplished gentlemen singing serenades under your window every night of the week and your rejecting them all as a matter of principle. You are not there yet and it does not seem to be that you want to be there. You just want to find a good person.

Last edited by hamster-bamster; Feb 22, 2013 at 08:42 PM..
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Default Feb 22, 2013 at 10:01 PM
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Originally Posted by hamster-bamster View Post
That is not chastity. That is ISO.

chas·ti·ty
/ˈCHastətē/
Noun
The state or practice of refraining from sexual intercourse.

You are not refraining from sexual intercourse. You simply do not have a fitting partner for that intercourse. When you find a fitting partner, you will have intercourse with him.

Chastity is having 5 outstanding and accomplished gentlemen singing serenades under your window every night of the week and your rejecting them all as a matter of principle. You are not there yet and it does not seem to be that you want to be there. You just want to find a good person.

It is still refraining from sexual intercourse regardless. I did not say I would definitely have sexual intercourse with him. Not unless he has a ring on my finger and we walk down the aisle and exchange wedding vows then and only then will it happen. Not going to fight with you. We just see things differently.
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Default Feb 22, 2013 at 10:19 PM
  #8
It is not a matter of fighting, but just of definitions. Your definition is fine. There are various definitions, according to Wikipedia, some accentuating no premarital sex, some no extramarital sex, some relevant to monastics, others to laypeople, etc. etc. A can of worms, in other words. The important thing is that you are happy with your choice and direction in life.
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Default Feb 23, 2013 at 12:14 AM
  #9
Melissa that is great. I don't want to argue w/ religious ethics either. You ask for opinions and we are all intitled to an opinion.

Here is my opinion. You should wait until you have a ring on your finger. You said you were bi. So you should not act on attractions to the same sex. You can have that attraction, that is not wrong, but acting on it is wrong. That is my opinion. It says that somewhere in the bible I think but w/ out looking it up I'm not absolutely certin. If you decide to have sex it needs to be married to a man to whom you are going to marry. And only after you are married.

I to am religious. I did not follow my own advice here. I had sex w/ my husband before we got married I did end up marrying him and we didn't try to have kids until 4 years later. I could have easily gotten pregnant because we were having pre- marital sex, but think God we got the opportunity to plan for our children. and we did get married not have sex and decide we didn't like each other as much as we thought.

Keep doing what you are doing. The Lord honors those who honor him.
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Default Feb 23, 2013 at 03:48 AM
  #10
Thanks big mama I am on the same page with that. Thanks for the support.
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