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tradika
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Default Sep 10, 2014 at 05:46 PM
  #21
1) Beauty can be pretty subjective. Especially as you get older. In high-school people are more likely to follow the crowd because people will put them down if the express desire for anything outside the societal standard. There are individuals who desire ALL sorts of different people.

2) No reason for anyone to ever be embarrassed of virginity or a lack of partners. Some people just can't emotionally cope with sex outside of a very trusting and committed relationship. It can be very detrimental to their mental health. If someone thinks you are less than because of this... Well, they have a serious problem.

3) The sexiest thing for healthy people is forward momentum. Take this time while you are not in a relationship to prepare yourself for life and an eventual relationship/family. That means working on your future career, mental, and physical health. You will still probably feel lonely, but it speaks volumes about what kind of person you are when you go forward anyway.
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Default Sep 10, 2014 at 06:19 PM
  #22
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Originally Posted by norwegianwoman View Post
Lol. Yeah, tell that to all the women being called sluts and *****s for being sexually active, or the girls being told they deserved to be raped because they flirted and dressed scantily - society has an extreme double-standard when it comes to women's sexuality. It's a "damned if you do, damned if you don't"-situation. If you DON'T do it at all, you're a prude, and no one likes that. If you do it and people find out about it, you're a slut. Some guys encourage girls to be so-called "sluts" because it gets them sex, but those guys respect girls LESS for sleeping with them, which provokes me greatly. They just see the girls as stupid for falling for this or that trick or "easy" for sleeping with them, they don't see that they are doing the exact same thing - but somehow it's okay, and somehow they believe they're always the one in control.

As for men - while religion has certainly suppressed male sexuality too, to some extent, as religion in general isnt very in favour of sex, it has done so in a completely different way. Female purity has become something divine, taken to the extreme where a mother who is still "pure" is one of the main holinesses in the religion. And women like Maria Magdalena, temptresses, have been portrayed as sinful and dangerous women. If you really go into this stuff there's done plenty of researach on it.
Well actually it's ironic, because many women will find a man who hasn't had sex a turn off. A lot of women aren't interested in a man who's a virgin or is sexually inexperienced. So women themselves are also partly to blame for men being encouraged to screw anything that walks. So the damned if you do or damned if you don't also applies to men because a lot women don't respect a man who had sex with loads of women and view him as a "player".

You only have to look out in Western society to see that women are encouraged to have sex. It's everywhere.
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Default Sep 16, 2014 at 03:37 AM
  #23
I don't know if I would say I'm ASHAMED of being a virgin, but I feel a bit pathetic. I'm 10 years older than you, so you've still got plenty of time before you get to being a big lame like me. Like you I've never kissed anyone, I've also never been in a relationship. I don't have a lot of trust in men when it comes to relationships. The only guys that would have sex with me would just want the sex, so I do sometimes feel a bit worthless in that sense, that I wouldn't be worth anything more than that. I'm not about to just be with anyone, I would wait for the right person. But I don't think it will happen, as I find myself rather repulsive and unattractive and I don't think I could be comfortable enough in myself to be with another person.
I do feel left out when my friends talk about sex though, in the sense that I can't join in and relate to the topic. Some people also have a habit of giving the 'well what would YOU know?' attitude when I do discuss the subject. People I know who have great relationships, who are married, etc., I do get envious of, because I'm alone and likely will continue to be.

Inevitably you don't HAVE to have sex simply because of your age, there is no requirement as to when you have sex, as long as you are of legal age. Someone who has sex at a younger age often regrets it later as they get older. Not to say you will of course, but don't get too envious of others your age who have had sex or think that it means you need to as well. I won't lecture you as to when you should wait until, who you should wait for, etc., but if the reason you feel you need to is because others have too, then it's not the right reason to do it. Do it because you WANT to do it.
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