Friend found Viagra at her boyfriend's draw. Is he lying?

My friend called me this morning. She was in tears. She found Viagra at her boyfriend draw. She was looking for painkiller and saw the box next to the other pills, it was empty.

She said they didn't have sex since October 2013. But the prescription date is may 2014.

She confronted him. And he said that he thinks he has a dysfunction and he was embarrassed to tell her. Then he went to the doctor and got the prescription. He said he tried fist alone to see if it works, but it gave him headaches and his blood pressure was very high. Then the there the pills at the trash.

Is he lying?

I have a male friend -- we're like brother and sister -- who became impotent due to medication he was taking. The doctor gave him a prescription for ten Viagra pills and told him to go home and "practice" alone to see how it worked and if he could climax and ejaculate on it. Apparently, it can make some men erect, but they can't climax and they grind away for ages on their wives and girlfriends and it's terrible. The doctor told him to use all ten pills in practice sessions and if it worked well for him he'd prescribe more so he could have intercourse with his new girlfriend. After 3 or 4 efforts to self-pleasure, he gave the pills to a friend who didn't have insurance. He couldn't climax, he got a raging headache and his chest felt tight. He said he was afraid he'd have a heart attack and it wasn't worth it.

I'm not an expert on Viagra, but your friends' BF's story sounds very similar to what happened with my pal. So it's possible he's telling the truth. Other than that, I couldn't say.

Thanks so much for your response. I will show it to my friend. She's devastated as she thinks he's been cheating on her.

I'll add one more thing. When he gave away the pills, he put them in an envelope and he kept the prescription bottle. He didn't want anyone else to see it with his name on it because it was so personal. He wouldn't even put it in garbage can. I don't know how he finally disposed of it. But he was even worried about the trash collector seeing it. It's an extremely touchy subject with many men.

This might be the reason why she found the empty box. She said they had sex before but that it was never wow.

Headaches are high BP are typical side effects, as far as I have read, but whether he had them or used them as a cover-up because he also read about them we do not know.

That makes sense for me. It doesn't make sense for her thought. She just found out that he's been visit strippers while she was traveling.

A man needing to take Viagra is very hard on him. It is painful on so many levels, and that is just internal to himself. But having to admit to his partner that his is having an ED is even harder, since the partner may start questioning whether they are still attractive or still being loved, etc. I had a difficult time because as an acknowledged bisexual man, my wife first started questioning whether I was still attracted to her or whether I would rather be with a man. She couldn't have been further from the truth.
The thing is it did take me a while of practice (taking the pills). You don't start out with 100mg right away. I had to start with 50mg cut in half, then a full 50mg and finally onto 100mg over a long period. I wouldn't be surprised that most guys use all of their first prescription just finding a working dose. Even after I found the right dose, I know that at least half of my Viagra are taken in "expectation" of an intimate encounter over the next 4 hours. Sometimes it doesn't happen, and I've spent all that time with an erection that wasn't satisfied.

I too get headaches afterwards, but it is a small price to pay for the results. I won't say much about giving meds away to others, but from experience there are many reasons for a guy to have received and taken a whole box of Viagra without ever having sex with the exception of masturbation.

Would you be willing to say more about this?

Well, most boxes of Viagra come with 6 pills. Let's just say the doctor prescribed an even dozen. They normally come at the lowest dose of 50mg. Unless the doctor specifically asks for a pill cutter to make them 25mg, we can stick with 50mg. (12 in the box)

I personally remember the first pill I took. As the doctor recommended, I took it alone. Then I sat/walked around for a long time, looking at my penis waiting for it to spring to life. Nothing happened. Four hours and no erection. (11 in the box)

A few days later I tried another one. This time I found that once I aroused myself, I got an erection and it stayed for only a little while. (10 left)

A few days later I tried again. This time I wanted to see if I took one, would it let me have multiple orgasms over the four hour period. Nope...just one (9 left)

I then decided try two pills for 100mg. It was a great erection, rock hard. I could use my penis to hammer in nails if I wanted. Even small distractions didn't cause me to lose my erection. As per the norm so far, masturbated only once, tried twice but effect was gone. However, major headache afterwards (7 left)

I tried the next time with one pill to see if I would get a headache. No headache, just one orgasm (6 left).

Tried the next time with two pills. Great erection...another post ejaculation headache (4 in the box).

Next time I took two pills with the same results. However I took Tylenol right after the orgasm, which kind of helped, but had some of a headache before the Tylenol kicked in. (2 left)

The last two I took WITH a Tylenol. I was able to have my erection, orgasm, and only a minor "buzz" left in my head where a headache would have been. (All gone...0 left)

I then got another refill and started using the little blue pills with my wife.

Simply put, I used a two boxes of 6 solely on my own, masturbating, trying to understand how they worked and the best way to take them to get the best effect. A whole prescription of Viagra used without having had sex with my wife. Now is everyone like me? No. I have a wife that would have told me not to take them after #1 (weak erection) and after #4/5 (double dose w/headache). It wasn't in my best interest to just jump into bed with a first time Viagra in me. Maybe I experimented with myself more than normal, but I was defintely more confident in myself and the pills when I finally got into bed with my wife with penis both of us could enjoy.

I hope that helps.

I'll add that in my experience with Viagra, a 'full pill' gives me a headache. Also, my doctor stressed that using these pills does not equal 'instant readiness' - there still has to be desire present. In other words, it won't really make up for a real loss of interest.

Yes. Thank you very much!

I know that using Viagra has a lot to do with expectations. The OP's friend expected that someone taking Viagra would have to be having sex. I personally expected that the first Viagra I took would turn my penis into a sexual divining rod. My wife expected that I would rely on my natural abilities and sexual desires to carry myself through for mutual sexual satisfaction, and hence tried to make me not take any Viagra.

However, I learned through the lonely trial how they worked for me biologically. It took me and my wife a while to understand how best to deal with my disability and use the tools we had. My wife is now rather positive towards Viagra, and is disappointed if I haven't taken one. We found that if I don't take Viagra, she is unable to get sexually satisfied from using her favourite position. This position puts certain stresses on my body which gives me pain/discomfort. With no feeling in my penis to "keep me focussed" and overcome the pain, I lose my erection. However, with the Viagra the erection stays through the pain and my wife "uses me for her pleasure" until she can't anymore.

It has given us both a boost in confidence, since we are both deeply benefitting from the Viagra.

I recognize that it is difficult for any guy to tell his partner that his penis isn't working right and that he may need to take Viagra. But since sex is a "team sport", I truly believe that guys need to be open and honest about their issue and when they are taking Viagra. My experience demonstrated to me it was nothing to be ashamed about and my wife and I were able to "score" more often when we were working off the same play book.

Again, I hope this helps someone.

My question is: has he lost interest on her? Why does he need to go to a stripper club? And it is even more devastating for her that she found it out through someone else. She's even talking about divorce. Very sad.

While it's pretty obvious what the main attraction of strip clubs is for men, it isn't the only draw. Sometimes it is nice to get some attention that doesn't have all the usual baggage attached.

I feel bad for your friend tho. I do suggest that she consider counseling before divorce. While it might well be that the worst has been going on, nothing is unsalvageable unless they choose for it to be so.

EDIT: Re-read your original post, and it concerns me that they haven't been intimate in nearly a year. Granted, if he's having "functional issues" maybe he's tried the strip club just to see if that stirs anything up.

Thanks very much! I am very concerned about my friend. She's a lovely and beautiful lady. This might be very difficult for her.
I have showed all your comments here. She opened her heart and told me that they have been dealing with this problem for a while. She getting into a depression, even to the point to pick up a lot of wait.
I have advice counseling, but she said that he refuses to go.

And I amost forgot. She mentioned something to me about sex addction. She found a lot os pornigraphy on the PC. She said that she found out a lot of disappointed stuff regarding to sex, and he's been having some intimate chat with other women.
To be honest this sounds totally confusing.

So if I could summarize:

It isn't known if he is having physical affair(s), but it is known that he:

--frequents strip clubs without her
--has a lot of pornography
--chats in an intimate way with other women
--has not had sex with her in about a year
--did not confide in her about possible ED or his effort to address it, thus apparently leaving her uncertain about his intentions regarding sex in the relationship
--refuses counseling

My thought would be that she might want to speak to a counselor on her own, to help her figure out the situation, her feelings, and what to do next.

I think I am going to try and go with her to see a conselour. She will speak with the conselour alone, but at least I think it will be easier if she has a friend to support.

Thanks again for your help.

I'm sure she'll really appreciate your support - that first step is always hard.

Bill3's summary really tells the story. Put that many things together and it is hard to ignore - he might not be having a physical affair, but in some ways the "chat room affair" can be almost as bad, because that person is essentially taking his affection. If he refuses counseling, that means he doesn't see anything wrong with his behavior, and that is not a good sign. Give her a big hug from us.