Emotional outburst in front of my date last night

((((TryingStill))))

It's a good forum, to find personal growth. I find it, noble to be able to share such profound and meaningful growth, in a group setting, such as this forum.

It's eye opening to realize change, in one's personal values.

I'm not judging at all. It's up to you how soon you have sex but I waited over a month with my now husband before we even touched each other apart from kissing and we went very slowly! It meant that when it happened it was a lot easier and we felt totally comfortable with each other. Perhaps if you had taken it a little bit slower and really got to know her first you wouldn't have had so much of a problem.

You should try yourself with someone else with a free mind, I think sometimes people can't get erections when they are tensed.

Have you tried looking at it from this angle:

- You made the girl come.

- You made her come during the first sexual encounter.

- You made her come only one week after meeting her.

***

And then try to estimate what percentage of men in your country can claim this sort of achievement in their lives.

PS You said that the girl said that she was having racing thoughts. I am not sure what you meant; racing thoughts are a very strong indication of a psychiatric disorder. If she told you that she was having racing thoughts, and if in Spanish racing thoughts are indeed a psychiatric syndrome, then that means that the girl has a mental illness, is knowledgeable about it, and is completely open about it. I doubt that this is the case - it is one thing to have sex with a boy after one week of knowing him and another thing to talk about one's psychiatric condition in professional jargon after such a short period of time knowing a new person, so I doubt that that was the case, but if it was the case, the girl deserves credit for not yielding to stigma.

On a more serious note, I am unclear as to why you started doubting yourself and even treating this as an issue. I do not see any issues based on your evaluation of the situation which you made before the self-doubt started.

You wrote that she was perplexed. That sounds exactly right. Appearing perplexed fits the situation. It is the most likely reaction.

You wrote that she did you dislike you. Nor that she liked what was happening.

Which is in line with saying that she was in neutral.

And then on the one hand she said that it was too much to deal with.

And then on the other hand she was relaxed enough to continue on and even have an orgasm.

So yes, confused, perplexed, a little bit of this and a little bit of that - neutral. It was not a negative experience - not extremely positive, but not negative, either. A tie - you can continue on with the girl and things very much can improve as the anxiety level subsides once you settle into a familiar, routine relationship, or you can call a day with the girl and move on to some other things, but treat it as a neutral experience and not a fiasco.