Boyfriends relationship with mom

My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years and before that we were really close friends for three years. He is 22 and lives at home with his mom. About a year ago I discovered that he was watching a lot of mature porn and was extremely hurt. I tried to confront him about it and tell him how it made me feel but he just said it was normal and that I was stupid for caring. I never left him over it, instead I just let all these thoughts conjure up in my head.. The women he is looking at look so much like his mom it literally makes me sick to even type this.. They are very close,his dad passed away when he was 7 and his mom homeschooled him. So it's just been him and his mom for 15 years. When we stay at his moms house we aren't allowed to sleep together, she gets upset and makes weird faces at him whenever he is being affectionate toward me( yes even after this long) he has to call her before he goes to sleep when we're at my house and it just really really bothers me. I've managed to ignore it for the last couple of months... But I just found his porn again...and the woman even has the same stretch marks on her stomach as his mom does. Also, they do their laundry together, she has sexy underware (sixty year old) she is always wearing extremely low cut shirts and I just really can't help but think something is up... I need help this is driving me insane.

I think you might not want to hear what I have to say about this. You need to step away from this boyfriend. His relationship with his mother doesn't sound very healthy to me. He shouldn't need to check in with her every night and he also shouldn't allow her to dictate whether or not he can be affectionate with you. You need to listen to what your instinct is telling you and find a new boyfriend. You deserve better than you have now.

If that is all the porn he watches then yes that is a red flag , but watching porn in general is not a big deal .
The way he responded to you was , not very nice and he could of said it in a better way .
( No one likes to be told what they can and can not watch )

If watching porn upsets you then you should make it clear when you date a guy that you do not except that . That way they know where you stand on that topic .

If you'r sleeping over at his mom's house then you should respect her wishes and not sleep in the same bedroom that is not odd at all , even tho he is an adult it is her house
and both of you should respect that .

I don't know how old you are but if you have your own place then maybe it's better to have him stay at your place for over night and not at his mom's place .

As for him calling his mom when he sleeps over at your place dose he have to or dose he want to big difference .

What I am trying to say is the only thing that I see as a red flag is that he is only watching porn that have a older woman .

Mom dressing sexy not a big deal that is just her style
It just seems to me you'r a bit hurt that he is closer to her then you .

Be honest with yourself do you feel a bit jealous ?
It's normal to feel that , I am sure his mom is and you'r feeling that vibe when your b/f shows you affection in front of her .

I don't know just follow your heart

I'm sorry but as for me his relationship with mom doesn't look normal..

It does bother me that he is closer to his mom than me.. he doesn't take me out, never pays for anything of mine (although I pay for him), and I don't have my own place but my parents give us privacy.. he hates coming to my house and is a homebody. I've tried to make plans for moving in together but he's not ready... It's like his life is on hold because of his lonely needy mother.. she is well off finacially and isnt sick or anything.. I just feel bad for my boyfriend because his life could.be so much more.beautiful if he just moved away from her and her negative self but she is all he has ever known, literally..

I just get a horrible feeling when I really think about it.. I mean, I've confronted him about all of this and he just got disgusted and defensive. Out of the over 15 times I've caught him looking at porn 13 have been mature.... They spend way more time together that. Me and my boyfriend because I am doing things with my life and am pretty busy and when we do have time together, there she is... This is my.first serious relationship.. maybe I should just say f it.. hard after all we'be been through. Am I crazy for suspecting something fishy? I just feel like I need to KNOW for sure.before I make a.big hurtful painful decision like.that based on assuptions..

You're probably not going to like what I say either. I just don't see much of a foundation to this relationship. Your suspicions about an incestuous relationship are neither here not there, nor is his choice of porn. The important thing is that there really just doesn't seem to be much of a relationship there nor any potential for one. Stop screwing around and look elsewhere if this situation isn't satisfying.