Not sexually attracted to anyone?

I've mentioned this in another post I made just now but I thought I'd open a new thread for the topic because I realized this really bothers me.

I'm 21 and I've never actually been sexually attracted to anyone. I'm in my second ever relationship right now and I'm not even attracted to my boyfriend. Of course I've seen guys around that I thought were handsome or even sexy but I've never ever experienced a moment of actually feeling any kind of chemistry or physical attraction. The fact that I'm a virgin probably won't come a shock at this point.
Many times in my life I have already considered if I was possibly a lesbian but I'm even less attracted to girls. I think asexuality also isn't a possibility because I do get sexual urges, I do masturbate and watch porn and all that - I just haven't felt that way towards any real person.

Could it be that I'm just too much in my head space and overthink things too much to allow these kinds of feelings into my head when I'm around people? I never fully relax when I'm in the company of others due to my social anxiety, could that be the issue? Has anyone got any idea on how I could possibly start working on this? I've only been in this relationship for less than a week and I know he won't pressure me into sex but I do want to have sex at some point - I just don't know if I can.

Heya, the spectrum for asexuality is a pretty wide and varying one, so you can definitely identify as asexual while still getting urges. I have zero sexual interest in people but still get urges to masturbate, sometimes with visuals. Mine goes even further to where I'm not really romantically interested in people either but still might not mind a platonic life partner someday. We come in all shapes and sizes.

Of course, there really is a possibility that some of your lack of desire stems from mood/anxiety issues but I wouldn't let anyone tell you there's no such thing as asexuality. I did for years - including to myself - and have only recently started understanding that part of me (remember - whatever your sexuality, it's just a small part of you).

If you haven't seen it, check out this site, its wiki/glossary and forums: The Asexual Visibility and Education Network | asexuality.org . I'm not affiliated with it but found it extremely helpful when I was questioning myself.

you could be asexual

Well I know when I think of the other person it's the connection within the act not just the actual act itself. Which you said is a big piece you're missing. Maybe it's finding the right guy? Hard for me to say since I don't know a lot about asexuality buuut it is perfectly okay to be asexual. Have you told your bf? I think he will start to wonder eventually and explaining it to him will help him go okay I get it now. This is a way around but I can't say for sure if it's healthy or not long run - you could let him watch? Sorry I don't have better answers but at least you get another perspective. Hope it helps