How? Stuck in a corner.

Hi everyone I don't know where to start literally..
I'm in my early 40's and have two kids, I left my daughters father 12 years ago and have not been in a releationship since, I was with him for 4 years although I wasn't being myself...fake it till you make it.
My problem is I have Aspergers (diagnosed last year) and social anxiety and find myself attracted to and more comfortable with females, I don't have friends that I could go out with and really struggle socially meeting new people. So how do I explore my sexuality? I have looked on dating sites but none wants someone who thinks they are lesbian or Bi ...god I haven't even kissed a girl...although I'd love to.

Two, First of all good for you on realizing who you are, kudos. Secondly look up the Kinsey Scale Test, though only subjective, it will give you an idea of where you fall on the continuum of sexuality. Thrice, please join our forum here, LGBTQ, you are not alone here at PC in this area.
I am definitely a bi male, I am equally attracted to women as I am to men, I have yet to explore, my bi-ness. I live in a small town where the community isn't out in the open, as far as I know, that and I live in a little fear of losing my position if I come fully out. I am a volunteer for a "Christian" homeless shelter and feel I would be discriminated against. I won't even mention that I just got newly inked; out of fear of termination.
Thankfully I have a few friends that know and understand and don't judge me, for being myself. I also have a great support system that gives me resources, not to mention my friends here at PC.
Now I caution you about looking online for people. I don't know how it is with women. However, I found out that guys are shallow as all get out and all they want is to get laid. I don't even bother looking, I will find someone one day, and the nice thing about being bi (for me) is that I am with someone who is female and is understanding of my bi-ness and accepts me for who I am.
I hope that in some way I have helped you out. I don't live with confusion anymore about my sexuality and I don't really care to live in fear, but it is a price that I am willing to pay. I am above it and I don't let anyone bring me down.

you dont have to be dating to explore your own sexuality. sexuality begins with you. take time to know you, not to get too graphic to start with think about a part of your body that you are happy with or would like to get to know. with me I started with my face. I looked at myself in the mirror and figured out what parts of my face I was happy with, I took time to touch my face and enjoy how it felt to rub my forehead, wash my face, put on make up. i even went to a salon and got a facial, waxed\tweezed and make up. they showed me what colors accentuate my features and how to put on the make up at home to get the same results. you would be amazed at how beauutiful a man or woman feels when someone else is doing the facials, waxing, tweezing shaving. I liked it so much and felt so much better about myself that I added a hair washing and hair care treatments to that day. Ive been known to get pedicures, manicures, you name it .

when you are comfortable in your own body thats when you move on to more sexually based activities like masturbation / and learning what pleases you. you cant please another if you are not comfortable with sexual activities. dating and intimacy is a situation made up of common grounds. people like to be with other people who have the same things in common. if you know what you like and dont like and what gets the job done so to speak its easier to find someone else with the same likes.

most people now do not just jump into the dating scene because of the dangers and diseases that come with that. they go into dating completely prepared so that they know who and what they are looking for and how to protect their self from danger and diseases...

my suggestion dont worry so much about finding someone. take time to be you and enjoy you. the right one will come along (and its usually a thing that happens when you least expect it)