Constantly craving intimacy ...

I'm in a bad relationship, of which there is no intimacy. We do have sex, but it is entirely focused on him. I give him oral, kiss, but he doesn't really touch me apart from penetration. He finishes in maybe 2 minutes and then rolls over to sleep or goes about his day.
I try to talk to him about it, I tried 'his/her nights'. He is just not interested in sexually satisfying me.

Iv started to fantasize about being with other men.. I fantasize about meeting men at work, while I'm out etc.. I can't help it. I'm SO sexually frustrated, I feel constantly aroused. I masturbate frequently and it doesn't even take away any of the urges.
I do not condone cheating, but I feel if this is to go on for many years I may end up doing something I regret horribly.

Iv tried to leave, or ask him to leave and he won't accept a breakup, we have young children together so that's the main reason I feel like I'm stuck in this situation.

Any advice to spice up our sex life? To bring up my frustrations without attacking him or making him feel Bad? I so badly want a connection with somebody, its starting to hurt.

I'm in the same situation as you except way ahead. Crap marriage, I'm ignored. Stay for the kids.
Imho I do condone cheating. I've done everything possible for him including telling him it's ok to go to a prostitute.
I've given up.
My goal now is moving forward, being independent & leaving this marriage. I've lost myself for over 20 yrs.
I hope you find something. Some help. Maybe a therapist some will say. How much time to do wanto put into this & how badly do u wanto save your marriage? Is your SO also willing to save the marriage too or are they clueless.

If you feel stuck that will lead to resentment.

To be honest I don't want to stay, he just won't leave and I can't afford to move out so here I am!! I do love him and wish with all my insides that he will change.. but I know deep down he won't.
I guess I just accepted my life this way and wait until I have enough money to leave with my kids. Ugh.
I wish everyday I just had a partner, someone i can connect with, love and be loved back. It seems like a completely unrealistic dream as of right now.
Sigh.

Sorry to hear you are dealing with the same thing.

There t many of us out here that are in the same boat so I can sympathize totally! Sorry you're going thru this.
I'm working on getting more employment. Not easy tho. I'm financially dependent on SO, but I'm reading more about what I'm entitled to when we do split.
It'll b war & I wanto b ready.
Horrible way to live; such a waste.

My wife and I have been married for 9 years now and we struggle to keep things interesting.

In the beginning, we couldn't stop f***ing.

So we are looking into things like date nights and such. We are spending more time talking and cuddling in bed. Just being close to each other will reignite the candle, we believe.

Anyways, I get your issue.

That's exactly how I feel too. Such a waste. Love is such a beautiful thing.. and here I am wasting it all away on someone who doesn't really care or feel the same way.
I took a dead end job working 6 days a week, 11 hour days just to save up to get out of this nightmare.
I guess I just don't understand why he fights the breakup so much if he doesn't want to actually invest any effort into our relationship. He begged and cried for me to come home when I left last year. Then for the following couple of weeks when I returned, we had the most mind blowing passionate sex. He kissed me, gave oral constantly and really made love to me. So, I know we have the connection, he just gets bored I guess.

That was us in the beginning too. The first time we had sex, he made me orgasm within a minute of of touching me. We have the connection, when he pays attention and puts in some effort.
But now, he doesn't want to talk in bed, he doesn't want to cuddle ever and sex consists of taking my underwear off, entering me and him coming within 2 minutes.
I don't even have chance to take my shirt off. I can't remember the last time I was naked with him ... It's like my after baby body completely revolts him :'(
I'm 125lbs and in good shape so I do try for him... I often receive compliments from other men that I look amazing for having 3 young children. I just wish he felt that way too.

From where I stand in my marriage my SO has gotten into the society's death trap of the gerbil wheel of life. We are pedestrian & have checked every box a suburban family could want. We should be happy. He is. I'm not.
I see the death of our marriage & so many others bec they have settled. Don't make waves or be different.
I don't want that. I want more & if it leads me to loneliness then I'll accept that.

Wow I am in a sexless marriage, no sex in over 10 years (I am 47). Neither of us can afford to live in this area alone so I think that is why we stay together (kids are grown). I would definitely cheat, given the opportunity...maybe it would help my self esteem, which is below zero right now. I am sick of my toys!

Cheating may make you feel good for a bit, but I imagine you would regret it at some point.

You should go to a sex counselor and see if you can't respark the sex in your relationship.

And cheating for others has saved their lives. Literally!
We stay in marriages bec society deems it correct. Divorce & the acceptance of it in our generation is fairly new. 20-30 yrs ago "people didn't get divorced." Did they love each other more then?
No, they accepted their miserable state bec it was frowned upon by religious sects, history & current society.
Less than 12% of primates are monogamous. So where does this ultimate pressure come from that we have to stay married or it's bad?? Just look back in our history

I have been in the same boat except I am a guy. She says she is physically attracted to me yet never initiates and basically lays down, takes her under ware off, and let’s me have sex with her. We have been married for 21 years. The last ten have been miserable because of this and I can say one thing for sure- staying because of finances only will cost you more money over the long term. I spent tens of thousands of dollars on counseling to no avail, moved to be closer to her family (1/2 million) and bought her a business as the kids are starting to graduate and leave. All I want is a wife who outwardly shows attraction and occasionally spices things up so it isn’t a sexual Groundhog Day every day. Some people have tried to normalize an affair, that’s a slippery slope as what you get is the newness of falling in love- everything is sparkling. I even went to a strip club and asked a few girls if they would be up for offering her tips on how to arouse a man. And before I get bashed, I have been to more than 10 years of therapy (individual, couples, and sex) only to basically have her not do her work