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Old 03-15-2018, 01:04 PM   #1
OblivionIsAtHand has no updates.
Member Since: Nov 2016
Location: United States
Posts: 134
2 yr Member
Default Hard to Describe What this Is

So every so often I will get this feeling of disgust regarding sex, but it's not your normal disgust. It's not pure revulsion in the classical sense. It's a weird and frankly funny feeling but it causes me to squirm/cringe. It has something to do with parsing sex down to its literal insanity. But it's the same kind of quasi-queasy feeling I get when I think of condoms and their nastiness. It's also along the lines of the feeling I get when I try to consciously squeeze my hands - it simply feels goofy. I'm not sure I've encountered anyone else who feels similarly.

Oh and any talk of sexual protection or speaking of sex in procreative terms gives that sick and funny feeling too.

I am not asexual, but the natural absurdity of sex with its spastic gyrations, guttural, animalistic moaning, exchange of liquids, etc. all becomes deeply laughable. Whatever this feeling is, it's not conducive to arousal.

Though it's not sex, but can partially resemble it, sometimes halfway through a lap dance I would break out laughing. Something is just hilarious and weird about the whole thing. It would leave the girl feeling like she had done something wrong.

Not to mention I am pretty disturbed by sexuality and its pure carnality. The urge to want to overtake or be overtaken and so forth. All very weird **** to me. The assumption that men cannot be discomfited by sex is really irksome. My therapist has never properly assuaged me about sex either. Basically she just was sort of 'Yep, it's ****ed up. But what can ya do?', although not in those exact terms.

Sex and all of its variant proclivities is a daily reminder, to me, that there is no God - that there's nothing special or divine about this libidinous, crazed lot - and we're barely out of the jungle. We carry out complex equations, conceive of modern marvels, wear suits and make business deals, but at the end of the day shed our clothing and engage in absurd choreography to carry our species forward, albeit sublimated.

I'd say Stanley Kubrick or the likes of David Lynch has captured the horror and weirdness of sex better than anyone.

Last edited by OblivionIsAtHand; 03-15-2018 at 01:44 PM..
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