How to keep from placing myself in danger

Is this the right thread for a bdsm question? I am almost 68 and recently after reading some soft dom/sub erotica, i became so aroused I decided to join an adult list and put myself out there. My age aside, i am on blood thinners. I un subbed off the list the first night when I realized I would never be able to service all these needy men. It was quite a shock to get naked photos. Nevertheless, I wanted to service some men and get an idea if reality was anything like my fantasies. The first men obliged me by belting my privates Black and blue. He was horrified and concerned. I assured him it didn’t hit. The last couple of whacks I did feel but no big deal. When I looked at my backside the next day and sent a picture, he cancelled. The third guy cancelled as well. There were may others but the one I promised to assist was a 68 year old dom. when he sent me photos of his Toybag, I was half terrified and half curious. By this time I had realized I had unprotected sex with the first guy. Maybe I can’t get pregnant but I could catch something. Since then I am concerned at my reckless behavior. I enjoyed my first and only encounter. I have never had an orgasm and didn’t then. We didn’t kiss. I teased him and begged for his belt and he obliged. Now i have ordered nipple clamps, **** plugs and a cat of 9 tails. I don’t know this mans name or where he lives, just that I am his slut and will take whatever he wants to give me. I’m pretty sure this isn’t healthy. Sigh. How do I reign myself in?

No, this is isn't healthy or safe behavior. I live the BDSM lifestyle and there is a saying in our community that everything should be safe, sane and consensual. What you are doing is not safe or sane. If you are truly interested in the lifestyle, I would suggest joining fetlife and looking for local community events such as munches (meet ups at local restaurants/coffee houses where you can meet others that are local to chat about the lifestyle). This is the best way to learn about how to practice this lifestyle safely and meet people in a safe environment. I see you are in FL, so am I. There are many great local BDSM communities here. I am very involved in mine and it has been so rewarding.

You shouldn't be blindly submissive to anyone (be their slut) in any scenario without getting to know them first. It is just like any relationship. You need to cultivate trust with that person...even more so in our lifestyle with physical pain being inflicted. There are so many predators out there ready to take advantage of new people to BDSM who are not well informed. Please educate yourself.

eta - don't let my screen name fool you (meant to be an ironic joke). I am a submissive and a masochist. I know what it feels like to be very eager to try alllll the things but your eagerness can come at a heavy price if you are not careful.

Hello Tpmhc: I see this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral! I hope you find PC to be of benefit.

I had written a much longer (windier?) reply to your post. However, in the meantime, MistressStayc posted her reply. And, in reading it, I decided mine was really superfluous. So I deleted it. I do hope you take what MistressStayc wrote to heart. She clearly knows whereof she speaks.

My best wishes to you...