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Old 02-22-2019, 03:00 AM   #11
daggy
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Default Re: Wanting

Why does life keep putting things up for me to jump over all the time?
If it is not one thing it is another.
If you try and fight the odds you are frowned upon.
How dare I want something better.
How dare I do nothing.
Its not rocket science
It is a wanting
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Old 02-22-2019, 11:07 AM   #12
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Default Re: Wanting

Quote:
Originally Posted by daggy View Post
Why does life keep putting things up for me to jump over all the time?
If it is not one thing it is another.
If you try and fight the odds you are frowned upon.
How dare I want something better.
How dare I do nothing.
Its not rocket science
It is a wanting

Doesn't Life keep putting up things for all of us humans to jump over all the time?

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Old 02-22-2019, 03:44 PM   #13
daggy
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But to fight and do your best then wonder why
I could do without all the lessons
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Old 02-28-2019, 06:04 PM   #14
daggy
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Default Re: Wanting

My wanting has turned into needing?
My needing has turned into surrender.
Surrender has turned to exploration
My exploration is so lonley
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Old 03-01-2019, 03:18 PM   #15
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As each week passes all I seem to hit are brick walls.
It is just my problem. It is nobodies fault.
All the other options are looking better.
Fighting a losing battle is just taking their toll.
Running around trying to find a "coach" to help is seeming impossible.
So ED options
Just go completely in the other direction and take medication to reduce the craving that will never be again and just stop the search and urges.
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Old 03-12-2019, 08:01 PM   #16
daggy
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Once again a week has passed and mentally I have tried to switch off.
So 5th visit urology and it's only meant to be 4 with another to come.
A cycle of who to see and when is confusing to the max, to say the least.
Wondering if females have so much trouble working through the medical system.
Just still left wanting and wondering
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Old 03-20-2019, 08:11 PM   #17
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Another week down and it definitely feels like I have lost the feelings for monogamy.
It seems it doesn't really matter what I want but what I am given.

I want someone to WANT me.

Just maybe one day.
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Old 04-09-2019, 10:40 PM   #18
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Anonymous57363 View Post
Hello Daggy. I am sorry you're struggling. May I ask if the cause of your impotence is psychological or physiological? Do you know? Of course you still have sexual needs...that's natural and I'm sorry you're feeling deprived of that.



Are you in a relationship...a sexless one or are you single? I think if you meet the right partner, you could certainly get creative with ways around the ED to share sexual intimacy. When you say you were told by a professional that you are "on a cycle," what does that mean? I'm sorry if I missed a piece. What do you think would help you? Have you ever posted on the men-focused thread? I wonder if other men living with ED could offer ideas and support? I'm a woman and I don't know too much about that particular issue but I do know it's quite common. Sorry I don't have a great answer for you but wanted to show my support. I imagine you must feel very lonely sometimes? I hope you can find the sexual connection you're seeking. Take good care of yourself.
Well haven't I been kicked while down
So here is the story whether I was right or wrong is mute now.
So had been trying to find a buddy through my online friends and ph contacts.
Right or wrong I respected their answer. Which in itself was therapy for me giving me the courage to keep trying against the odds.
Until this morning when I rang an old gf
She herself has many personal problems but I was at least expecting a bit of empathy.
Well didn't she unload on me making me feel worthless and basically telling me my cancer was my fault and I was in her past?
Making me actually wonder why I even bother.
When I can just sit in the corner here and let life pass me by.

She would be crying and carrying on if I wasn't here
Fml
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Old 04-10-2019, 12:43 AM   #19
daggy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by daggy View Post
Well haven't I been kicked while down
So here is the story whether I was right or wrong is mute now.
So had been trying to find a buddy through my online friends and ph contacts.
Right or wrong I respected their answer. Which in itself was therapy for me giving me the courage to keep trying against the odds.
Until this morning when I rang an old gf
She herself has many personal problems but I was at least expecting a bit of empathy.
Well didn't she unload on me making me feel worthless and basically telling me my cancer was my fault and I was in her past?
Making me actually wonder why I even bother.
When I can just sit in the corner here and let life pass me by.

She would be crying and carrying on if I wasn't here
Fml
Ok so I'm way past caring who sees my junk both metaphorically and physically
The reason we my wife and i. Yes I'm married
The reason is I had prostate cancer that left me impotent and we have gotten every pill lotion and pump there is and still didn't work.
They tell you that mentally there is a cycle you go through as in hope try depression over and over until that is all my time is taken up with.
Then you start to try outside factors to see if anything excites
Then after finding the courage to ask outsiders to help to be knocked back by everyone.
Because apparently, sex doesn't matter.
I can tell you it does.
Then you come across an old GF who puts the boot into your ego and blames me for getting cancer in the first place.

So i think that's it.
Fml
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