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Veteran Member
Member Since Oct 2011
Location: USA
Posts: 533
12 55 hugs
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#1
My partner, due mostly to physical conditions, can’t be “ totally “ involved, sexually. The thing is that I can’t get a compromise. I want and need some passion in my life. I need intimacy in my life. I don’t need someone who won’t even “ touch “ me ! I feel like because I want to get rid of this “ tension “ I’m doing something wrong. She treats me as if I was a stranger on the first date looking for love. I mean WTF ! I don’t want to be with anyone else and I’m sick and tired of having to do it “ alone”. This is so frustrating ! She doesn’t try and look for any kind of help or way to work it out. Which is making me finally come to the realization that she just doesn’t want to bother anymore. Is that how much she cares about my feelings ??? Especially after all I do to try and make her feel good ? She says she can’t feel any pleasure anymore. Is that possible ?
__________________ Today is the first day of the rest of my life. *Disclaimer * Anything I have posted is strictly my own personal opinion or experience , and is in no way, shape, or form meant to portray a professional assesment of any kind. CB |
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Anonymous44076, Doomraven0
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#2
That's a really tough situation continuosly blue. Do you feel comfortable sharing the "physical issues" that your gf struggles with? Are these actually related to her sexual health? Or is it more like chronic pain or chronic fatigue related to other problems?
She says she can't feel pleasure anymore....what specifically does that mean...sexual pleasure...she can't orgasm or is it more like anhedonia associated with depression? Random question: is she on the pill? MDs typically won't share this but the pill kills sex drive for a LOT of women. I had several gfs who went through this. They noticed a change, kept going to the doc, and couldn't find anything wrong. For one reason or another, they later went off the pill and BOOM! Sexual desire returned quite quickly. I just mention in case that may be affecting your gf? I am sorry you are frustrated. Ultimately, if sex is important to you and it is not valued or wanted by your gf, perhaps you need to take a step back and think things over? There's always the option of talking to an experienced sex therapist but I'm not sure if your gf would be open to that? I wish you peace. Feel free to share more info if you feel comfortable. |
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Veteran Member
Member Since Oct 2011
Location: USA
Posts: 533
12 55 hugs
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#3
I really should have just stressed that it appears to be hormonal.
She doesn’t have any in relation to physical sex. Has no desire. No passion. Cannot feel any pleasurable sensations. I don’t know if I really believe this. I think it’s just personal because of a very long and contentious marriage. ( Too complicated to get into here ). Doesn’t want to even talk about any possible solutions, or new , or different approaches to the subject. My basic question is this , ( and I’ve put this out there many times) : Does a woman need “ hormones “ to have any passion whatsoever. Do you need hormones to want to please your partner even though you can’t be pleased yourself. Maybe I just don’t believe her. __________________ Today is the first day of the rest of my life. *Disclaimer * Anything I have posted is strictly my own personal opinion or experience , and is in no way, shape, or form meant to portray a professional assesment of any kind. CB |
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Anonymous44076
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#4
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With regard to your wife not wanting to talk or try other options, that could very well be due to the emotional problems you mentioned that you've both had in your marriage. So, based on what you posted it sounds like she wouldn't be open to speaking with a therapist...do I have that right? It's a really tough situation. You have my empathy Continuously Blue. May I ask if you love your wife? Are there still traits you appreciate about her? How long have you been married? If you'd rather not answer those, no problem. |
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Junior Member
Member Since Apr 2019
Location: Oregon
Posts: 11
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#5
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Unfortunately, in my situation, nothing has changed, but i am hopeful for you that things will get better for you and your relationship can come out the stronger for it. Cheers, and good wishes to you, mate. |
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