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Stuck1nhead
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Member Since: Aug 2016
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Default Apr 14, 2019 at 11:15 AM
  #1
As the title says I’ve been having a lot of dreams featuring me and another man being intimate. I’m not really freaked out by these dreams since I have never had the chance to explore my sexuality. Which I probably never will because I’m marrying the first and only person I’ve ever been with. Now she has no idea about my dreams and neither does anybody else. I’m actually very afraid to talk about them with my fiancée. I worry that if I do she would want to leave me. I do find women very attractive, but these dreams have had me questioning my sexuality.
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Default Apr 14, 2019 at 12:19 PM
  #2
How do you feel about the dreams? Aside from your concern about what your fiance or others would think. How do you feel when you think about the dream or replay scenes from it...are they pleasurable? In the dream, are you enjoying what's happening?

I think it may be significant that you are about to embark on marriage while feeling that you have not explored your sexuality....perhaps that's the reason for the dreams? Your mind is wondering what else you might enjoy if you were free to explore? I obviously don't know. Just thinking of ideas. Have you ever found a man attractive? As well as women, I mean. If you looked up some photos of handsome male celebrities, does that do anything for you?

I would NOT recommend telling your fiance right away. I don't think that would go over well or help either of you. If the dreams are of interest or concern to you, you could talk them over with a therapist....there are sex therapists who specialize in such topics....find someone experienced and non-judgmental regarding sexual matters. If, after exploring the issue with a professional, you find that there is more going on here than just a few dreams, then you could talk to your fiance. Also, maybe you don't need to be in a rush to marry...perhaps take some time? Waiting never hurt anyone.

I've had a few sexual dreams about women but I'm happy in a committed relationship with a man. I think it probably depends on the person. If you feel there's an itch you need to scratch, that could be worth further exploration.

I hope you find the answers you seek!

Last edited by Anonymous44076; Apr 14, 2019 at 12:32 PM..
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Default Apr 14, 2019 at 04:51 PM
  #3
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Originally Posted by Stuck1nhead View Post
As the title says I’ve been having a lot of dreams featuring me and another man being intimate. I’m not really freaked out by these dreams since I have never had the chance to explore my sexuality. Which I probably never will because I’m marrying the first and only person I’ve ever been with. Now she has no idea about my dreams and neither does anybody else. I’m actually very afraid to talk about them with my fiancée. I worry that if I do she would want to leave me. I do find women very attractive, but these dreams have had me questioning my sexuality.
I know I gave you a rather hard time on your question about marriage thread. But, after reading this, I think this could be the root of your concern. The only way to find out what your true sexual identity is, is to go out on a date with a man before you get married. Don't be one of these guys who marries a woman to hide their homosexuality; because their wife is their 'beard' or disguise.

The fact that you're afraid to talk to your fiance about your dreams tells me that you really aren't emotionally available to her, if you are afraid to talk to her about your dreams, which could mean nothing or could mean everything.

You can't marry another person if you can't be 100% transparent with them about who you are. People do of course, but then they get divorced, have affairs, or do worse things to their spouse.
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