advertisement
Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
Pygmalion
Member
 
Pygmalion's Avatar
Pygmalion has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jul 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 125
3 yr Member
35 hugs
given
Default Jul 09, 2019 at 01:41 AM
  #1
From what I can gather 'sissy' is a largely American term for humiliation via forced or coerced sexual feminisation or cross-dressing, like a sort of psychosexual masochism. Is that right?

Would the term then be inappropriate for those who desired or weren't forced into CD or feminised behaviour? Or for those who didn't connect it to sex?

What about someone who adopted femme characteristics as an internalised humiliation without being forced or it being connected to sexual activity?

__________________
male hetero (GNC/CD phases) inorganic psychesexual (objectum spectrum)
Pygmalion is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote

advertisement
sarahsweets
Threadtastic Postaholic
 
sarahsweets's Avatar
sarahsweets has no updates.
 
Member Since: Dec 2018
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 6,006 (SuperPoster!)
5 yr Member
192 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Jul 09, 2019 at 03:39 AM
  #2
I think insulting anyone with a misogynistic, overtly feminine "term" in order to be derogatory is reprehensible. I do not think it matters what it refers to specifically.

__________________
"I carried a watermelon?"

President of the no F's given society.
sarahsweets is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Pygmalion
Member
 
Pygmalion's Avatar
Pygmalion has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jul 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 125
3 yr Member
35 hugs
given
Default Jul 09, 2019 at 03:48 AM
  #3
Quote:
Originally Posted by sarahsweets View Post
I think insulting anyone with a misogynistic, overtly feminine "term" in order to be derogatory is reprehensible. I do not think it matters what it refers to specifically.

Although it's a derogatory term, it's a self-appropriated term used by the community (just like queer). Its derogatory nature is part of the intent - since it seems largely connected to humiliation.

I'm asking about specific limits of the term because I want to know if I fall into the sissy camp myself during those times when I desire to dress/act like a female.

__________________
male hetero (GNC/CD phases) inorganic psychesexual (objectum spectrum)
Pygmalion is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
downandlonely
Legendary
 
downandlonely's Avatar
downandlonely has no updates.
 
Member Since: Mar 2018
Location: United States
Posts: 10,760 (SuperPoster!)
5 yr Member
10.6k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Jul 09, 2019 at 03:53 AM
  #4
I think it's up to you if you want to reclaim the word "sissy" just as "queer" has been reclaimed and can be used by the LGBT culture in a non-derogatory way. I haven't heard anyone use it in a positive way, but maybe you can be the first.
downandlonely is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Pygmalion
Member
 
Pygmalion's Avatar
Pygmalion has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jul 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 125
3 yr Member
35 hugs
given
Default Jul 09, 2019 at 08:23 AM
  #5
Quote:
Originally Posted by downandlonely View Post
I think it's up to you if you want to reclaim the word "sissy" just as "queer" has been reclaimed and can be used by the LGBT culture in a non-derogatory way. I haven't heard anyone use it in a positive way, but maybe you can be the first.
I'm genuinely suprised I'm the first person you've heard use the term in a non-derogatory way. I'm a hetero with very limited contact with the LGBT community and yet I'd already heard the term used in a cool way multiple times, both in conversation and even in mainstream culture (Ru Paul?)

If you just type sissy into google or YouTube one quickly finds the term used of this gay/CD/BDSM subculture, including videos, a Wikipedia entry, academic literature and multiple sissy discussion forums.

I'm guessing by people's reaction so far there isn't much awareness here, and not many sissy gurls/boys have frequented this forum??? I hope I'm wrong, I'd like to discuss this with folk who are the 'inside' so to speak, so I can think about this aspect of my identity more clearly.

__________________
male hetero (GNC/CD phases) inorganic psychesexual (objectum spectrum)
Pygmalion is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
sarahsweets
Threadtastic Postaholic
 
sarahsweets's Avatar
sarahsweets has no updates.
 
Member Since: Dec 2018
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 6,006 (SuperPoster!)
5 yr Member
192 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Jul 09, 2019 at 09:15 AM
  #6
Are you saying that Gay people are reclaiming the term because it was once a derogatory slur for gay people? Does it apply to both men and women? I feel like because its a female word used originally as a way to slander and demean gay people (particularly men and boys and straight ones as well) that I have some onus in the word being used negatively or positively.

__________________
"I carried a watermelon?"

President of the no F's given society.
sarahsweets is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Pygmalion
Member
 
Pygmalion's Avatar
Pygmalion has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jul 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 125
3 yr Member
35 hugs
given
Default Jul 09, 2019 at 09:23 AM
  #7
Quote:
Originally Posted by sarahsweets View Post
Are you saying that Gay people are reclaiming the term because it was once a derogatory slur for gay people? Does it apply to both men and women? I feel like because its a female word used originally as a way to slander and demean gay people (particularly men and boys and straight ones as well) that I have some onus in the word being used negatively or positively.
Not being part of the community, and not being American, it's really hard for me to say.

But from the outside looking in, and that only briefly, it seems that there's a gay BDSM culture that has taken back the term 'sissy' and applied to effeminate bottom gay males who are 'forced' into CD as an act of sexualised humiliation.

Wiki only says:
"In the BDSM practice of forced feminization, the male bottom undergoing cross-dressing may be called a sissy as a form of erotic humiliation, which may elicit guilt or sexual arousal, or possibly both, depending on the individual. This is forced, changing the man's sexuality. Methods include things like hypnosis and reinforcing gifs. After watching them, in some fantasy scenarios, the man will start to think he is attracted to men and that he is a female.[27][better source needed]"

But it seems there's more to it than this.
I think we need someone more conversant with the culture to provide input, tbh.

Edit:
Here's a quickly found academic example of the term 'sissy':
https://core.ac.uk/download/pdf/11337817.pdf

Further edit:
It also seems to apply to Hetero submissive males who are dominated by a female into wearing/acting femme. Doesn't seem to be used of women at all, afaik.

__________________
male hetero (GNC/CD phases) inorganic psychesexual (objectum spectrum)

Last edited by Pygmalion; Jul 09, 2019 at 09:36 AM..
Pygmalion is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Ezrigirl
Account Suspended
Ezrigirl Ezrigirl
 
Member Since: Jul 2019
Location: United States
Posts: 154
3 yr Member
4 hugs
given
Default Jul 10, 2019 at 07:17 AM
  #8
Quote:
Originally Posted by sarahsweets View Post
Are you saying that Gay people are reclaiming the term because it was once a derogatory slur for gay people? Does it apply to both men and women? I feel like because its a female word used originally as a way to slander and demean gay people (particularly men and boys and straight ones as well) that I have some onus in the word being used negatively or positively.
@sarahsweets

Being a lesbian, nobody has ever called me a sissy. Nor, if I was around other lesbians, would we call each other sissy. The term sissy in my judgment, is for gay males.
Ezrigirl is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
Pygmalion, sarahsweets
Pygmalion
Member
 
Pygmalion's Avatar
Pygmalion has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jul 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 125
3 yr Member
35 hugs
given
Default Jul 10, 2019 at 08:46 AM
  #9
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ezrigirl View Post
@sarahsweets

Being a lesbian, nobody has ever called me a sissy. Nor, if I was around other lesbians, would we call each other sissy. The term sissy in my judgment, is for gay males.
Yeah, I've been spending some time investigating this and asking around online LGBT communities, and it does seem exclusively for males.

It seems both hetero and homo males can be sissy, and that it needn't be directly related to BDSM - it basically just means the adoption, often pretend forced, of a stereotypically stylised femme performance with cross dressing. This may or may not be part of a ritual humiliation, or sex play, or whatever.

It seems for me, that because my sometime desire to 'feminise' myself is connected to my own internalised humiliation at failing to perform masculinity correctly, this would be a type of sissy even without the sexualised element.

It also seems, from my limited encounters with online gays on this topic, that this area is still somewhat taboo even amongst some LGBT folk.

__________________
male hetero (GNC/CD phases) inorganic psychesexual (objectum spectrum)
Pygmalion is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Pygmalion
Member
 
Pygmalion's Avatar
Pygmalion has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jul 2019
Location: UK
Posts: 125
3 yr Member
35 hugs
given
Default Jul 12, 2019 at 12:02 PM
  #10
I've just joined the gender discussion forum that was recommended to me on another thread, so I might find some more info in time.

__________________
male hetero (GNC/CD phases) inorganic psychesexual (objectum spectrum)
Pygmalion is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
All times are GMT -5. The time now is 01:43 AM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.



 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.