advertisement
Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
callingforthesun
Member
 
callingforthesun's Avatar
callingforthesun has no updates.
 
Member Since: Mar 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 77
10 yr Member
Default Nov 16, 2019 at 08:34 AM
  #1
I feel like there's something wrong with me. I know logically and rationally that I have many good qualities and my loved ones enjoy being around me and strangers notice me and are friendly. but inside all I can feel is insecurity. I hate it when anybody is looking at me/watching me/checking me out...I hate the feeling of being evaluated or judged...I hate looking people in the eye. I hate using my voice and saying my opinion. I love writing but I won't even write my thoughts or poetry out on actual paper for fear of people finding it. I secretly want to just hide away and be a hermit and not talk to anyone...I have so much inside of me and Im just afraid to share any of it...because of how much I've been hurt, because of how our society views women and people who "feel too much"....I can't stand it anymore. part of me really wants to throw my whole life away and isolate myself wherever I can survive just so I don't have to deal with worrying about what other people think of me, especially the people who love me. they adore me and I just want to get away from them so I can be alone and drink and smoke and live inside my own head. and none of it works...I'm so miserable. I don't understand why I can't go into the grocery store and check people out, like everyone else apparently does...instead I walk like I have blinders on, don't look at anybody, pretend other people don't exist and get out of there as quickly as possible. I'm not comfortable anywhere, at any time, under any circumstances. even my own home. it's awful.
callingforthesun is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
MrsA, zapatoes
 
Thanks for this!
mote.of.soul

advertisement
Luz2019
New Member
Luz2019 has no updates.
 
Member Since: Nov 2019
Location: Rhode Island
Posts: 4
3 yr Member
Default Nov 17, 2019 at 01:57 PM
  #2
hey ,How can I post a new thread?

I happen to see your post because it was #1 on the list and I had some free time and read through it.

Im truly sorry that your going through a difficult moment in your life and it must be extermely difficult to go through it.
If you havent already sat down and spoken with a couselor thats probably a good place to start.pouring out your heart sometimes helps clear out the clutter, than you can make room to start storing new things.

Im not an expert or anything but I might have some life lessons that might be beneficial.

So start by asking yourself
1) what is bothering you the MOST.?
In life were going to have many obstacles but we can only overcome them one at a time and take it day by day. Your going to have good days and not so great ones but either way we got to stay focused and keep going.you have no choice but to better yourself in whatever area needs work and practice makes perfect.so dont quit on YOU!

2) Problem 2
Your dont want to express yourself in writing because you want to keep your feelings hidden and not be exposed.
*again ask yoursef why you dont want your feelings validated and when was the first time you felt that way.
Are. You thinking maybe nobody will value your feelings or simply not care enough to invest emotionally in hearing you vent .
*Find the root case why you believe , what you believe.because whatever it is, its holding you back from being the best you can be.
Expression of self is unique and theres no right or wrong way.some express through Art, music , writing books..you get the idea. Not expressing yourself is cutting yourself short from some positive opportunities that are very rewarding for yourself.
Find a nice hiding place for your journal, Maybe try hiding your journal i between your mattress

3)why do you want to Isolate yourself?
Find the root cause and possible goals to overcome.
*Have you considered joining a support group in your community where they'll be more sensitive and caring to your needs and ways to overcome or overcome if not .maybe you should start one at your local library.you can overcome that fear , and i think you'll be surprised your not the only one with this battle and you need to reach out and surround yourself with careing people. Total isolation is not the solution but maybe ignoring Negative people for a while might be a good start in the meantime .

4)so you want to drink and smoke ? Sounds like your trying to self medicate your feelings?
Im not trying to judge you but most people do it for that reason to try relieve their anxiety.
Your basically stuffing down your feelings to not deal with them and drinking & smoking to try to numb yourself , but Guess what its just festering and its only a matter of time before they come back and emerge.
If you want to feel different you have to do things differently.when you start to get those feelings ask yourself what triggered it and retrace your steps and find coping skills to rid your stress .something positive thats tangebile and physical like walking, biking, playing an instrument etc. Get your mind focused on activities that are rewarding.

When were under stress our bodies release a chemical called adrenaline..that basically makes you feel panic..but you can get rid of it.drink plenty of water because that helps too.

5)Tell yourself Everyday what makes you unique and valuable that others might dismiss because they dont know how to appreciate a good thing. But you wish others would notice.
Others may not value in you and miss out , thats theyre loss..but dont do it to yourself dont become your worst enemy.
Take a few minutes and tell yourself what makes you such a wonderful person.
Maybe your kind, have a great sense of humor, hardworking.you fill in the spaces.😉
6)

Get a notbook.
Start by Writing on one page (The Problem) and on the Back (possible Solutions) and coping skills to get through the hard time because its going to be a bumpy ride.problems wont go away right away it takes time and Patience but with determination you can achieve your goals.

Im trying to look at the big Picture as an outsider looking in.
I hope this helps 😊

You feel Insecure
*Ask yourself why?
Find Solutions to overcome it.

Mind valley: Marrissa Peers on youtube helped me and its free
Luz2019 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
MrsA
Member
MrsA has no updates.
 
Member Since: Apr 2019
Location: Nevada
Posts: 308
3 yr Member
398 hugs
given
Default Dec 10, 2019 at 10:24 PM
  #3
I sort of know what you mean. I get nervous when people notice me because I wish I was pretty enough to not be afraid to let people look at me. It does get a bit better as you get older. I used to be afraid to express any opinions and some teachers thought I was crazy and gave me a hard time, they even said things to my parents that got me punished even thoughnI had reslly good grades.

I only hope you will outgrow it over time and be more comfortable in your own skin. It bothers me less in my 30s than my 20s because I gained more confidence in insisting on being the way I am. Good luck. I hope this passes for you with time.
MrsA is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
All times are GMT -5. The time now is 11:19 AM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.



 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.