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Old 07-05-2020, 07:35 PM   #11
PrettyBoy17
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Default Re: Selective Social Anxiety? Or just an irrational fear of strangers?

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Originally Posted by AzulOscuro View Post
I do understand it. It always happened the same with me in relation to my coworkers and job were too way more easy for me to deal with.
I see it normal because you are good at your field and intelligent so this is the door you may find open to grab it and also improve in other social situations. But, you will have to make an effort. Itís not easy.
You know, I don't know if I'm good at my field because I'm new to it still. I have the academic knowledge, but I don't have the practical experience yet. I'm also not very confident. So it comes down to if I feel good at what I do and if other people seem to agree that I'm good at what I do.

In many social situations, I feel held back that my real and core self is unacceptable to others and I have to play a character or a different version of myself. For years, I did not even have a personality. When I was finally in an environment (a school I used to work in) that gave me positive feedback for having a personality, I actually began to have a personality again (at least on a more regular basis), but that was the point that my significant other began to pull away from me. I don't know if there's a direct correlation, but I also can't rule that possibility out. And then there is the whole gender thing...I just feel like I can't truly be myself around others because who I am is not acceptable to enough people in the US yet. In a purely social environment, I'm not sure how to interact with others when I'm inferior and different. It just gets tiring pretending to be someone I'm not and I really don't feel safe to be myself (referring to personality) until people have been deemed safe. How can I take that risk sooner?
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Old Yesterday, 06:19 PM   #12
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Default Re: Selective Social Anxiety? Or just an irrational fear of strangers?

Wished I had the power to send your unconfident to the rubbish so you werenít afraid of being you. And display your personality. This is the right and the most pleasant thing to do by any of us. A first need.

I have been also going through life in most of the cases, wearing masks to hide my true self, which I considered inadequacy, different, embarrassing.
I encourage you to go on therapy. In regards to it, you felt it was helping you, somehow?

P.S.: Donít feel forced to do anything. Only when you see yourself ready. Itís only my personal view, I donít want you to take a risk that can mean you giving a backwards.
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Social Anxiety and Depression.
Excuse my English, pleasssssse!
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Old Today, 02:09 PM   #13
PrettyBoy17
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Default Re: Selective Social Anxiety? Or just an irrational fear of strangers?

Quote:
Originally Posted by AzulOscuro View Post
Wished I had the power to send your unconfident to the rubbish so you werenít afraid of being you. And display your personality. This is the right and the most pleasant thing to do by any of us. A first need.

I have been also going through life in most of the cases, wearing masks to hide my true self, which I considered inadequacy, different, embarrassing.
I encourage you to go on therapy. In regards to it, you felt it was helping you, somehow?

P.S.: Donít feel forced to do anything. Only when you see yourself ready. Itís only my personal view, I donít want you to take a risk that can mean you giving a backwards.
I think I spent too long in an academic environment (as in a university). Those places are toxic and cold. Going back to a high school environment, it was finally accepted to be energetic, to really have a sense of humor, to be unique, to even like your own thing and not what everyone else liked.

I do still live in a country where it can be dangerous to be anything outside of what is expected when it comes to gender. I can be refused medical care...I could potentially be assaulted or killed unless I hide enough to be ďacceptableĒ. My job may be safe now because of recent Supreme Court rulings, but Iím not sure. It feels entirely like me against the world. I donít have immediate allies in real life to help defend me if necessary and I donít have the emotional strength to fight against everyone wherever I go about who I am. And people telling me Iím wrong about myself confuse me so then I wonder if Iím wrong about who I am. But it doesnít seem safe to ever try to figure it out.
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