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Old 03-19-2016, 10:52 AM #11
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Default Re: somatization disorder

Bruxism is probably one way the somatization is showing itself for you. That's all somatization is; instead of being able to confront and resolve fears and emotional situations they get internalized and they have to come out somehow so they pick on your body. That tension has to be released. Grossly over or under eating and various other physical tics or habits can be other ways. Basically it's just a physical manifestation of mental difficulties, not something you can work on directly since it's misplaced; you can't will yourself to not grind your teeth (but bruxism can be like your brain twiddling its thumbs; if you eat something chewy like a bagel before bed it can help tire out the muscles so you won't grind in your sleep as much). Working on what's causing the anxiety and getting more comfortable in your life/skin should help your body so it can relax better and not freeze, jiggle, grind, etc. :-)
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Old 03-19-2016, 11:50 PM #12
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thanks, my jaws are messed up from grinding so much for so long - since i was toddler
think i have that Temporomandibular Joint Disorder :/

i know whats going on with me is pretty severe... i guess it makes sense to do things like that because i bottle alot up and internalize it i guess...

so strange
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Old 03-20-2016, 08:32 PM #13
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Default Re: somatization disorder

I think some somatization is normal for being human, or we would otherwise not have expressions like heartbroken. A lot of people feel their mental issues in their bodies as well. I guess the difference between that is that some somatization is dissociative, the mind can split off from the mental pain and the body pain will still remain. That is probably why in some cases, the mind can not control the body fully, there is a dissociation. People can dissociate mentally, so it would be strange if it could not include the body as well.
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Old 04-04-2016, 02:23 PM #14
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i really need to talk to a doctor about dissociation... need to figure out if thats what is wrong..one of the things wrong atleast..
i've been trying to read about it but... i have always felt like this so i just thought it was normal
but it was saying that trauma at young age causes this stuff...?
compartmentalizing and dissociating things constantly
i've been living something like a double life for ever now - i just dont remember any of it... makes you so tired
not sure which "face" is the real face anymore
i dunno, things just happen and i cant do anything about it anymore...
its all a dream, it would seem... but i feel like it has to be real... im just confused lately its hitting me so hard...
i need more patience , gotta focus...
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Old 04-05-2016, 06:31 PM #15
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i have been thinking more..and i think its actually panic attacks... but its so intense i feel like im falling out of my body... too much stress i guess...
its almost like i can see everything zoom out in an instant like falling back while my body falls forward... and then i pop back in with that intense fear ... disorientation... it happens in waves... and it just keeps shooting that fear panic sensation through my body .. i guess adrenaline..? pulsating...
my depresion has been so bad that it was dominating the anxiety but now i think the anxiety is coming back through... this is extremely unnerving, scary, alien to me... i just cant describe what it feels like... i just get strong sensations... i dont want to fall out of my body how can i make this feeling stop? im so afraid of heights and when it happens it feels like im really high up and going to fall... so things do that zooming effect... like you see in the movies when they look down...?
makes me so scared

i wish i had some klonopin
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Old 06-10-2016, 06:27 PM #16
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Default Re: somatization disorder

A full psychological assessment would likely include the Millon personality test that allows a psychologist to diagnose both somatization and avoidant personality disorders. The test is older than the DSM V, so the diagnoses do not perfectly fit the categories in the DSM V, but it is highly regarded and frequently used by professional to aid in diagnosis. That is probably how your psych reached the diagnosis. It would come from your answers to a whole bunch of questions and how those answers compare to other people's rather than the answers to a few specific questions
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Old 06-19-2016, 11:50 PM #17
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I think a second opinion or full evaluation from another pdoc would be good for you. Is this something you can do when your insurance kicks in? I've read many of your posts and I don't think your pdoc is explaining things to well nor are they giving you enough time for your questions. You deserve more.

I've been seeing my pdoc for years and our sessions are usually around 45 minutes. How much time are you getting? I understand your concerns and desire to read up on your illnesses. Thinking of you. xo
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Old 06-27-2016, 02:09 PM #18
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They gave you an ICD-10 diagnosis in the US? I thought they were still using the DSM V... or IV, given some psychiatrists and psychologists really dislike the DSM V. o.o
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Old 07-18-2016, 06:35 PM #19
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Default Re: somatization disorder

they probably never will allow me to have any type of disability benefits... they denied me at the ALJ level so they're just gonna keep denying me any kind of help im sure... but allow other real frauds to abuse the system... way to go you guys... push the sick over the cliff and you wont have to worry about them at all anymore...

i dont even know anymore what the diagnosis matters... my **** is messed up beyond recognition so i think there just are not any labels that could make sense of any thing...

somatization disorder was a new one to me though... they really need to give me a battery of tests over a short/long term type period because of how these things present themselves and how some things arent allowed to present themselves at different particular times...
but thats just retarded too... dunno why i have to be so broken and complicated... the complexity is enough to piss the doctor off and leave me just feeling completely drained and hopeless... i hate myself...

i dunno why he used those diagnosis codes... it was suposed to be a full assessment... i know it took 3+ hours to complete... but like i said apparently when i disconnect some symptoms hide themselves from my complete awareness and i guess inaccuracies come up because i shouldnt of answered this that way or selected this choice because its not true... but its not like i choose to be like this... i know im sick of it... sick of life in totality...

i see a therapist maybe 2 times a month right now because i cant afford to travel to the office any more than that... and still waiting for them to allow me to see the pdoc because i guess they are only accepting priority cases at the moment due to previous pdoc being retired..
not sure how long the therapist talks with me since time just does not rejister in my head... but i guess its supposed to be like 45 minutes... i dont really know, dont remember anything about the meetings anyways...

starting to truly believe a brain as damaged as this is not even worth the trouble saving...

they'll probably throw me back into some hospital again and im forced to be around people all the time when im at home so why would i willfully accept going to a place to be forced to be around more people that i dont want to be around, cant hide from, cant smoke or drink, cant cut or do anything besides comply... complying with their stupid rules and stuff doesnt fix anything for me, ill just black out and next thing i know im in the same shoes back at home dieing for a drink to numb the pain and turn off the brain so i can forget how broken this body is.... such a shame to be so young and so old at the same time... thus is the way of life... fate comes to your door and you all of a sudden dont have a door anymore, or walls, house, anything to hide within...

wish it would just end....

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Old 07-19-2016, 10:44 PM #20
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Default Re: somatization disorder

Jesus, dude. I'm sorry you feel so terrible. ..And I'm sorry I only mentioned the ICD coding previously. I don't even remember commenting, to be honest. I'm having some similar issues right now; today, they confirmed a diagnosis of Conversion Disorder that I received back in November. It's one of the somatoform disorders.

You're not broken, man. There are just some wires crossed. Same here. My s--t's kind of jacked, too. I can sympathize with the way you feel, the those assessments are... Christ, takes 50 years. God knows I'm not some wise elder. I'm freaking 21. And psych hospitals? Feel you on that one. That's a big F--K no. I wish I could do something more to help you out. At least say something more comforting. Dissociaton is a pain in the *** (rear-ended a guy back in September thanks to that).

That being said, shoot me a DM or something if you just want to vent. Or even generally chat. Or whatever. Just something that might even distract you from what's going on. Again, I'm so sorry that you're suffering. I hope things will start to at least start to look a little brighter for you. Or look less dark.
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