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CasuallyAwkward
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Member Since: Sep 2018
Location: Washington State
Posts: 13
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#1
Hello. I've had issues with my self esteem I believe since late elementary school. It's really difficult to feel proud of myself for anything that I do. I occasionally get compliments for various little things, but they always either feel empty or undeserved. I don't think the people who give them are trying to placate me. I hope not at the very least. Any advice?
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Anonymous32451, Skeezyks
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Skeezyks
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#2
Here are links to some articles, from PsychCentral's archives, that discuss building self-esteem, quieting your inner critic, & accepting compliments & praise:
6 Tips to Improve Your Self-Esteem Having Trouble Accepting Praise? Learn to Overcome Fear and Low Self-Esteem To Boost Self-Esteem: Take A Compliment 10 Ways to Stop Thinking You're Not 'Good Enough' How to Metabolize a Compliment https://psychcentral.com/blog/can-yo...sts_position=2 https://psychcentral.com/blog/a-surp...dium=popular17 https://psychcentral.com/blog/what-t...dium=popular17 __________________ "I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last) |
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CasuallyAwkward
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Anonymous32451
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#3
Quote:
I honestly hate when someone compliments me. I hate it I either A- ignore it entirely B- say, " you must mean someone else" or C- find a contradictory statement like after they have complimented me, say " but such and such" |
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Anonymous32451
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#4
sometimes it even causes me to have a panic attack.
not sure why... it just does |
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Junior Member
CasuallyAwkward
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Member Since: Sep 2018
Location: Washington State
Posts: 13
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#5
Thank you Skeezyks. I'll try to refer to a few of those articles. It's just incredibly difficult since the first step is always trying to figure out positive things about yourself.
I'm with you there Raging Vortex. The only difference with me is that I'm so absolutely terrified of offending people that I usually just end up locking up and falling silent. The conversation pretty much dies after that. |
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Anonymous32451
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Deejay14
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Location: USA
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#6
How about just say Thank You with a little smile.
__________________ True happiness comes not when we get rid of all our problems, but when we change our relationship to them, when we see our problems as a potential source of awakening, opportunities to practice patience and learn.~Richard Carlson |
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Stone92
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Member Since: Aug 2018
Location: MN
Posts: 132
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#7
What I do when I struggle with this is, I try to put myself in the shoes of the complimenter. They are trying to make me feel good. I want them to feel like I am grateful for their effort, so I just thank them and try to move on. If they compliment me on a specific skill or task, I try to move the conversation to something else about that skill or task. Or, I compliment them on something right back.
__________________ I'm non-binary, and use he or they pronouns. I've been taking Testosterone for 8 months! |
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