people you care about don't respect you

Randle McMurphy · Feb 03, 2019 at 02:23 PM

how do you deal with this issue? I think this seriously messes me up. people not having respect for me seems to happen with every person I have sustained interactions with in life, but its particularly painful when it's someone you care about.

Feb 03, 2019 at 02:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Randle McMurphy

how do you deal with this issue? I think this seriously messes me up. people not having respect for me seems to happen with every person I have sustained interactions with in life, but its particularly painful when it's someone you care about.

I very much have this. But I guess I know on some level that my actions tell them they shouldn't respect me. I have thought about what I might change to have them respect me... such as
- dressing to keep up with the Jonses'
- being serious all the time.
- being friends with people that are vipers

And then I think about it, and I realize, I don't want to change my behavior, so I am just going to have to deal with the disrespect.

Randle McMurphy · Feb 03, 2019 at 03:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Emily Fox Seaton

I very much have this. But I guess I know on some level that my actions tell them they shouldn't respect me. I have thought about what I might change to have them respect me... such as
- dressing to keep up with the Jonses'
- being serious all the time.
- being friends with people that are vipers

And then I think about it, and I realize, I don't want to change my behavior, so I am just going to have to deal with the disrespect.

yea I have never had an interest in status symbols and living that way, I am a modest person who just desires to get by in a world where everyone wants to have more than the next. it's kinda depressing how much society can reinforce the feeling of being less than everyone else if you refuse to buy into the competition based ideology. I guess a solution is to not give a ****? but that's always been easier said than done.

Buffy01 · Feb 10, 2019 at 06:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Randle McMurphy

how do you deal with this issue? I think this seriously messes me up. people not having respect for me seems to happen with every person I have sustained interactions with in life, but its particularly painful when it's someone you care about.

I am sorry that this has happen to you. I feel the same way.

sarahsweets · Feb 11, 2019 at 06:25 AM

How would you define disrespect? What do people in your life do when they do not respect you?

TishaBuv · Feb 11, 2019 at 07:19 AM

I’ve had this happen to myself so often and seen it happen to others all the time, too. It IS frustrating!

There’s really nothing you can do aside from accept that they don’t respect you. Don’t take it personally, because they don’t respect anybody!

It’s usually to their own detriment anyway. For example, my husband is a professional at something that my mother asks his advice about. He goes out of his way to get her the best professional advice, yet she instead takes the advice of my sister who has no knowledge about the issue. Of course she makes a terrible choice and suffers greatly for it. Frustrating!!!

KD1980 · Feb 11, 2019 at 11:28 AM

Could you give examples of how they disrespect you?

In my case, I was surrounded by toxic people. Are these people toxic or mean?

Mar 13, 2019 at 05:30 PM

I have felt this way! Sometimes I've had the end the friendship. Other times, I've just expressed how I felt. I'm curious to know some examples of what's gone on, Randle, but this thread is also about a month old, and I understand if you don't want to, or if the issue has gone away.

daz1056 · Mar 15, 2019 at 07:40 AM

What you define as disrespect might be defined as respectful by the other person. here's an example, person 1, it's respectful to get everything off my chest and communicate my feelings with tough love. Person 2, It's repectful to keep my feelings to myself so or only communicate them in a way that doesn't hurt the other person.

These two attitudes generate completely different behaviours, both of them out of respect for others. Have you sat down with the people who you feel are disrespecting you to find out what there rules for respect are? Do you know what your own rules of respect are?

May I suggest the next time this happens you stop and think about this and communicate with the other person to sort out your differences. It'll help you feel alot happier knowing who is and who isn't behaving disrespectfully from their point of view.

sarahsweets · Mar 17, 2019 at 05:17 AM

People that care about you should respect you if they don’t respect you they don’t care about you.

mountainstream · Apr 09, 2019 at 04:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Emily Fox Seaton

I very much have this. But I guess I know on some level that my actions tell them they shouldn't respect me. I have thought about what I might change to have them respect me... such as
- dressing to keep up with the Jonses'
- being serious all the time.
- being friends with people that are vipers

And then I think about it, and I realize, I don't want to change my behavior, so I am just going to have to deal with the disrespect.

I have this too. I don’t want to change to be like that.

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Randle McMurphy Member Member Since Jun 2013 Location: earth Posts: 202 10 15 hugs given	Feb 03, 2019 at 02:23 PM #1 how do you deal with this issue? I think this seriously messes me up. people not having respect for me seems to happen with every person I have sustained interactions with in life, but its particularly painful when it's someone you care about.
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sarahsweets Threadtastic Postaholic Member Since Dec 2018 Location: New Jersey Posts: 6,006 (SuperPoster!) 5 192 hugs given	Feb 11, 2019 at 06:25 AM #5 How would you define disrespect? What do people in your life do when they do not respect you? __________________ "I carried a watermelon?" President of the no F's given society.
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KD1980 Member Member Since Nov 2018 Location: Los Angeles Posts: 368 5 1,334 hugs given	Feb 11, 2019 at 11:28 AM #7 Could you give examples of how they disrespect you? In my case, I was surrounded by toxic people. Are these people toxic or mean?
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Anonymous49426 Guest Posts: n/a	Mar 13, 2019 at 05:30 PM #8 I have felt this way! Sometimes I've had the end the friendship. Other times, I've just expressed how I felt. I'm curious to know some examples of what's gone on, Randle, but this thread is also about a month old, and I understand if you don't want to, or if the issue has gone away.
	Reply With Quote

sarahsweets Threadtastic Postaholic Member Since Dec 2018 Location: New Jersey Posts: 6,006 (SuperPoster!) 5 192 hugs given	Mar 17, 2019 at 05:17 AM #10 People that care about you should respect you if they don’t respect you they don’t care about you. __________________ "I carried a watermelon?" President of the no F's given society.
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