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Poohbah
Member Since Jan 2012
Location: Scotland
Posts: 1,259
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Feb 15, 2018 at 04:41 AM
#21
first of all am HE not SHE also am not leaving him he says he is getting help from one of my friends this is going no further and he has been calm and we both are happy
We have talk about it together i made the mistake of posting this post i now want it locked but thank you all for supporting me but i think i let this get too far __________________  |
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 Anonymous87914
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Poohbah
Member Since Jan 2012
Location: Scotland
Posts: 1,259
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Sep 30, 2018 at 12:12 PM
#22
sorry to bump this up again ...i need help he hurt me psycally grabing me when we had a fight ...sorry i cant cope he more controling now should have listened
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Junior Member
Member Since Sep 2018
Location: MN
Posts: 16
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Oct 01, 2018 at 09:58 AM
#23
Quote:
Don't let Your Husband say "YOU ARE CAUSING HIM TO LOSE CONTROL" If that were to be the case he'd be losing control on everyone. He is losing control ONLY ON YOU to gain control. He does that by using fear! You are seriously in a Dangerous position! Get help as soon as possible. Try and Not argue with him. When You can get things in place to leave arguing only put You in a more serious position. Make sure He is giving You YOUR medications on time! That will be important to Your recovery. 
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Wisest Elder Ever
Member Since Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,325
(SuperPoster!)
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Oct 10, 2018 at 02:00 PM
#24
It sounds like he is very controlling.
 The issue re medication  and the usual lack of useful help (and their appallingly limited vocabulary... the “helpers” irl in this forest is regrettable
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Oct 10, 2018 at 06:03 PM
#25
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Poohbah
Member Since Jan 2012
Location: Scotland
Posts: 1,259
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Oct 27, 2018 at 12:25 PM
#26
He has hurt one of my fingers he slammed the laptop down on it using phone unsure if its my fault think i need help
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Oct 27, 2018 at 02:47 PM
#27
I think he already passed the "warning signs." I agree with others that this is abuse. I want to say go to couple's counseling but he may get defensive... I think you should tell your family and/or his family. I agree with nicoleflynn that you should definitely contact the abuse hotline.
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Oct 27, 2018 at 04:42 PM
#28
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jan 2012
Location: rochester, michigan
Posts: 3,111
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Oct 27, 2018 at 08:19 PM
#29
You should NEVER go into couples counseling with an abuser; they need help all by themselves. Abuse is a choice, and most abusers don't think they have a problem and will blame the victim.
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Member
Member Since Oct 2018
Location: Australia
Posts: 45
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Oct 27, 2018 at 10:38 PM
#30
Well he's violent and has grabbed you hard and slammed a laptop on your fingers so that's already abusive. Breaking things and punching walls etc is considered emotionally abusive, because it sends the message that "this is what I'm capable of doing to you" and "this represents what I want to direct at you." Being controlling is abusive too. So yes, these are huge red flags and he's already passed all the warning signs straight into actual abuse. Your rocking back and forth and the shock.. it's clear you are currently being traumatised. Please seek help and try to remove yourself from the situation and the relationship. Can you afford to live on your own or stay with a friend/family member?
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Poohbah
Member Since Jan 2012
Location: Scotland
Posts: 1,259
12 20 hugs
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Mar 09, 2019 at 04:16 PM
#31
its getting worse ...i am scared
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My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.
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