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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Mar 2018
Location: USA
Posts: 1,740
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#1
So if an abuser abuses out of anxiousness. Just uncontrable urges since childhood. No sexual gratification. No power seeking etc What would be the purpose?
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Magnate
Member Since Mar 2017
Location: Underground
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#2
Sounds like the purpose would be to reduce anxiety.
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Mar 2018
Location: USA
Posts: 1,740
6 144 hugs
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#3
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Member
Member Since Oct 2018
Location: Australia
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#4
That's still abuse. It's always about gaining a sense of power and control, whether they're consciously aware of it or not.
Doesn't really make sense to abuse someone out of anxiousness, so I'm guessing that's simply a lie to avoid responsibility for being an abuser. |
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Mar 2018
Location: USA
Posts: 1,740
6 144 hugs
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#5
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Magnate
Member Since Mar 2017
Location: Underground
Posts: 2,439
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#6
Why would sex be a way to reduce anxiety? Why would masturbation be a way to reduce anxiety? Why would self harm be a way to reduce anxiety? Why would bingeing and purging be a way to reduce anxiety?
There are a ton of different harmful behaviors that reduce anxiety. I don't know why it is. When you write "why does an abuser abuse out of anxiousness" the logical answer is "to reduce his anxiety". He has a feeling and he responds to it - with no thought to anyone or anything else except his own immediate feelings. Why he is anxious and why he ignores the legal and moral implications of his actions are different questions entirely. The human drive to reduce or avoid negative feelings is a powerful one. |
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#7
Anxiety is not a legitimate excuse for abuse, as there is no excuse for abuse.
However, it can contribute to heightening the abuser's emotions. For example, say someone has an anxiety about you leaving him. He would react by becoming more controlling or threatening. Or he may have a general fear of abandonment, or be paranoid about people because he can't trust anyone. There may be some events that trigger his emotions, which he may not have the skills to regulate. Again, I am not excusing him for his behavior; just trying to figure out some possibilities. Last edited by Anonymous43949; Oct 28, 2018 at 03:15 AM.. Reason: typo |
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Mar 2018
Location: USA
Posts: 1,740
6 144 hugs
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#8
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I am more curious how sex and anxiety get mixed together. |
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