advertisement
Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
starryprince
Member
 
starryprince's Avatar
starryprince has no updates.
 
Member Since: Mar 2015
Location: Among the stars
Posts: 405
8 yr Member
288 hugs
given
Trig Apr 11, 2019 at 10:53 AM
  #1
Hey all. This is a very vulnerable post for me but I don't have many places to turn to at the moment. This post has to do with childhood sexual abuse and going to the doctor when you're older. I'm just going to put the whole thing as a trigger warning, just to be safe.

Possible trigger:


I have a therapist but I haven't seen her in months due to something happening that I didn't like. I'll call her to make an appointment, though, because it's very hard for me to find another one at the moment. I will talk about this in our session, whenever that will be. We started talking about it but I was so embarrassed that I just shut down.

Has anyone here ever had the same or similar issue ? Any advice? Thank you to all those that read this. I appreciate it.
starryprince is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote

advertisement
Amyjay
Magnate
Amyjay has no updates.
 
Member Since: Mar 2017
Location: Underground
Posts: 2,439
5 yr Member
692 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 12, 2019 at 07:44 PM
  #2
Hmm, no "good" advice from me sorry. I have never been and I never will. I know there can be consequences to that. So be it.
Don't be like me.
Amyjay is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
sarahsweets
Threadtastic Postaholic
 
sarahsweets's Avatar
sarahsweets has no updates.
 
Member Since: Dec 2018
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 6,006 (SuperPoster!)
5 yr Member
192 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 13, 2019 at 05:39 AM
  #3
I was traumatized by an OBGYN. Not sexually and its involved so I wont get into details. It kept me from going to see one for about 5 years. I finally found one through the help of my mom believe it or not. She is an ICU/recovery room nurse and had one in mind and sort of talked to him ahead of time in order to get him to understand where I was coming from. I made an appointment and he met with me in his office for like a half hour before we even did any exam. He talked me through everything he was going to do and talked out loud as each thing was coming up. He made sure to have a female chaperone with us too. Once I got through that exam it was easier going to him the next time. I have a lot of health issues and I was overdue for a lot of tests.

__________________
"I carried a watermelon?"

President of the no F's given society.
sarahsweets is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
starryprince
Member
 
starryprince's Avatar
starryprince has no updates.
 
Member Since: Mar 2015
Location: Among the stars
Posts: 405
8 yr Member
288 hugs
given
Default Apr 13, 2019 at 07:24 PM
  #4
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amyjay View Post
Hmm, no "good" advice from me sorry. I have never been and I never will. I know there can be consequences to that. So be it.
Don't be like me.
Thank you for responding. I get that. It's very scary. I want to go but it is very scary.

Quote:
Originally Posted by sarahsweets View Post
I was traumatized by an OBGYN. Not sexually and its involved so I wont get into details. It kept me from going to see one for about 5 years. I finally found one through the help of my mom believe it or not. She is an ICU/recovery room nurse and had one in mind and sort of talked to him ahead of time in order to get him to understand where I was coming from. I made an appointment and he met with me in his office for like a half hour before we even did any exam. He talked me through everything he was going to do and talked out loud as each thing was coming up. He made sure to have a female chaperone with us too. Once I got through that exam it was easier going to him the next time. I have a lot of health issues and I was overdue for a lot of tests.
I'm glad you were able to get through your fear and that you got a great doctor! I'm afraid of a lot of things, mainly the pain and the feeling of vulnerability. It just feels so invasive and I'm worried of getting a horrible doctor. The doctors I've been getting at my medical center have been horrible as of late. I would definitely prefer a female doctor. I'm going to call and make an appointment. That way, I can prepare. Maybe I can even ask a friend to accompany me (not in the actual examination room but just to the center, you know?) or maybe talk to a friend beforehand. Thank you for responding!
starryprince is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
HowDoYouFeelMeow?
Grand Member
 
HowDoYouFeelMeow?'s Avatar
HowDoYouFeelMeow? has no updates.
 
Member Since: Sep 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 750
8 yr Member
893 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 13, 2019 at 07:59 PM
  #5
I’m sorry to hear of your situation. Thanks for your bravery in sharing. You are not alone. Im in my mid 30s and have been once about 5 years ago. My T helped. She actually suggested a doctor (her own, this was helpful to me but I understand others might find it uncomfortable). She told me in general what would happen. Before the actual appointment, I went to the OBGYN building twice. The first time I just sat in the parking lot and looked at the building. The second time I went into the office, told them about my anxiety, and asked to see the exam room. They were nice and gave me a little tour. Also, no men allowed for me. And Xanax was taken. Hopefully this gives you some ideas about making things less terrifying.

It’s time for me to go again, but now I live in a different state with different doctors. Maybe new T can help. A referral from a good friend has helped some, but not enough for me to actually go.

__________________
"I think I'm a hypochondriac. I sure hope so, otherwise I'm just about to die."

PTSD
OCD
Anxiety
Major Depressive Disorder (Severe & Recurrent)
HowDoYouFeelMeow? is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Anonymous46969
Guest
Anonymous46969 has no updates. Edit
 
Posts: n/a
Default Apr 13, 2019 at 08:04 PM
  #6
Tell the nurse/doc whoever you see first that you are a CSA survivor. This is their profession & they've dealt with many times before. There is even a protocol for it. If you know what you need, tell them. I need to know what's going to happen next. Some docs incorporate the protocol into every first time appointment especially if an older first timer. That may include a shorter exam, the presence of a nurse who will even hand hold if you like. Prefer a running conversation or silence...just tell them. They want to make it as comfortable as possible as this is an important part of physical health. If you want to take a friend with you, do so. Don't need to explain. Just plan a lunch or shopping afterwards. Take care of yourself.
  Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Raindropvampire
smiling musical soul
 
Raindropvampire's Avatar
Raindropvampire tired of being tired
 
Member Since: Mar 2010
Location: Indy
Posts: 43,373 (SuperPoster!)
10 yr Member
1,837 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 13, 2019 at 10:57 PM
  #7
My fear of going was compounded by the fact that my main abuser(uncle) was a doctor. I simply explained what I had been through to my doctor. She called around for me and found someone she thought I would be comfortable with. The first appointment was just a get to know you and she showed me the instruments that would be used. She also told me in detail what to expect and that she would talk me through what she was doing. Then I made a second appointment and the actual exam was not nearly as bad as I thought it would be.

Good luck to you and wishing you the strength to get through it.

__________________
I think I need help 'cause I'm drowning in myself. It's sinking in, I can't pretend that I ain't been through hell. I think I need help---Papa Roach
Raindropvampire is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
starryprince
Member
 
starryprince's Avatar
starryprince has no updates.
 
Member Since: Mar 2015
Location: Among the stars
Posts: 405
8 yr Member
288 hugs
given
Default Apr 15, 2019 at 12:55 AM
  #8
Quote:
Originally Posted by HowDoYouFeelMeow? View Post
I’m sorry to hear of your situation. Thanks for your bravery in sharing. You are not alone. Im in my mid 30s and have been once about 5 years ago. My T helped. She actually suggested a doctor (her own, this was helpful to me but I understand others might find it uncomfortable). She told me in general what would happen. Before the actual appointment, I went to the OBGYN building twice. The first time I just sat in the parking lot and looked at the building. The second time I went into the office, told them about my anxiety, and asked to see the exam room. They were nice and gave me a little tour. Also, no men allowed for me. And Xanax was taken. Hopefully this gives you some ideas about making things less terrifying.

It’s time for me to go again, but now I live in a different state with different doctors. Maybe new T can help. A referral from a good friend has helped some, but not enough for me to actually go.
And thanks a lot for sharing your experience, too. I might have to take something for the anxiety if it gets intense. I've only had one medication prescribed for anxiety but I only took it once and it was not helpful. I'm proud of you for going, though. Hopefully I can build up the courage to set an appointment soon.

Quote:
Originally Posted by cavaliers View Post
Tell the nurse/doc whoever you see first that you are a CSA survivor. This is their profession & they've dealt with many times before. There is even a protocol for it. If you know what you need, tell them. I need to know what's going to happen next. Some docs incorporate the protocol into every first time appointment especially if an older first timer. That may include a shorter exam, the presence of a nurse who will even hand hold if you like. Prefer a running conversation or silence...just tell them. They want to make it as comfortable as possible as this is an important part of physical health. If you want to take a friend with you, do so. Don't need to explain. Just plan a lunch or shopping afterwards. Take care of yourself.
Letting them know straight up is the way to go, it seems. That would make me feel more comfortable in addition to them talking things through. I wish I wasn't so nervous. -sighs- And taking care of myself afterwards is a good idea, too. Thank you for your helpful response.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Raindropvampire View Post
My fear of going was compounded by the fact that my main abuser(uncle) was a doctor. I simply explained what I had been through to my doctor. She called around for me and found someone she thought I would be comfortable with. The first appointment was just a get to know you and she showed me the instruments that would be used. She also told me in detail what to expect and that she would talk me through what she was doing. Then I made a second appointment and the actual exam was not nearly as bad as I thought it would be.

Good luck to you and wishing you the strength to get through it.
Knowing that I don't have to do the actual exam at the first appointment is extremely helpful, so thank you for mentioning that. I think that will make things a lot easier for me. Like you and other people said, expressing my feelings at the beginning seems like a good idea. I'm afraid to be that vulnerable but I think I'll have to so I can feel as comfortable as possible. Thank you very much for telling me about your experience.
starryprince is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
HowDoYouFeelMeow?
 
Thanks for this!
HowDoYouFeelMeow?
Fuzzybear
Wisest Elder Ever
 
Fuzzybear's Avatar
Fuzzybear has no updates.
 
Member Since: Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,300 (SuperPoster!)
20 yr Member
81.2k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 15, 2019 at 04:41 PM
  #9
Thank you for bravery in sharing. I’m sending hugs and positive thoughts

__________________
Fuzzybear is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
All times are GMT -5. The time now is 02:06 PM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.



 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.