advertisement
Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
pachyderm
Legendary
 
pachyderm's Avatar
pachyderm without status for sure.
 
Member Since: Jun 2007
Location: Washington DC metro area
Posts: 15,865 (SuperPoster!)
15 yr Member
2,857 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default May 10, 2020 at 08:28 AM
  #21
Anna Jarvis: The woman who regretted creating Mother's Day - BBC News

She did not like the commercialization that followed.

__________________
Now if thou would'st
When all have given him o'er
From death to life
Thou might'st him yet recover
-- Michael Drayton 1562 - 1631
pachyderm is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Anonymous41006

advertisement
Abusedbysister
Member
 
Abusedbysister's Avatar
Abusedbysister Trying to build his life!
 
Member Since: Oct 2017
Location: Canada
Posts: 127
5 yr Member
199 hugs
given
Default May 10, 2020 at 12:11 PM
  #22
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pfrog View Post
Thank you for sharing, @pachyderm and @Abusedbysister ...

I find it awful how their acts of cruelty and abuse remain with us even decades later!

I, too, was so preoccupied with other things that I hadn't given it much thought until the end of a meeting on Friday when everyone started wishing everyone else a Happy Mother's Day! I so wanted to yell to hell with Mother's Day when that happened - but most would probably be aghast should something like that get uttered aloud so I sucked it up and kept my trap shut! It's almost like being forced to keep it silent and secret all over again!

Sibling abuse is also a horrid thing! I got it from the top down. Even wrote a little poem about it early into my recovery process:

Not so certain of who I am
Most of me went to the sire & dam(n)
Siblings too, both brothers & sis
As for me, not much of this
I hope they spent me well

The sorry bastids, every one of them!

Feel free to post here anytime you feel a need, @Abusedbysister even if it isn't about your mother.

As for me, I still feel the same ...

Eff my mother, Eff mother's day, and while I'm at it - Eff 'em all ... It will take a lifetime, if ever, to overcome all the damages done!

Thank you for the reply. I love your poem. I could totally relate to this. She definitely spent me well physically and emotionally and most of me went to her. Thanks again.
Abusedbysister is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Anonymous41006, Fuzzybear
Toughcooki
Member
Toughcooki has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jul 2020
Location: Texas
Posts: 221
3 yr Member
247 hugs
given
Default Jul 23, 2020 at 11:03 AM
  #23
I know this is an old thread, But it spoke to me...
My mom was neglectful, abusive, and when I finally escaped, vengeful. I cut off all contact, haven't spoken to or heard from her in 25 years. Mother's day doesn't bother me a bit - I'm pretty numb about everything at this point. My dad doesn't love me either, so I don't get particularly bent out of shape over Mother's Day. It is only on reading this that I wonder if I've shoved some stuff down.
Toughcooki is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Anonymous41006, Bill3, Fuzzybear
 
Thanks for this!
Bill3, I Am Am I, pachyderm
Fuzzybear
Wisest Elder Ever
 
Fuzzybear's Avatar
Fuzzybear has no updates.
 
Member Since: Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,300 (SuperPoster!)
20 yr Member
81.2k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Jul 28, 2020 at 03:19 PM
  #24
Quote:
Originally Posted by Thirty shades View Post
My mother has passed now.

I believe she was depressed and that made her emotionally abusive when I was younger. She could still say things that caused pain when I became an adult.

In her eyes it was me that was a problem, even as a tiny newborn and that opinion never changed even when she found happiness.

Much love to all those who have suffered abuse
much love to all who have suffered abuse

__________________
Fuzzybear is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Anonymous41006, Bill3
 
Thanks for this!
Bill3
Bill3
Legendary
Bill3 has no updates.
 
Member Since: Mar 2009
Location: USA
Posts: 10,923
15 yr Member
24.1k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Jul 29, 2020 at 09:03 AM
  #25
Much love in return!
Bill3 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Anonymous41006
nicoleflynn
Grand Magnate
nicoleflynn has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jan 2012
Location: rochester, michigan
Posts: 3,111
10 yr Member
60 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Jul 29, 2020 at 10:48 AM
  #26
Sadly, it had nothing to do with who you were/are, and everything to do with the problems of the abuser
nicoleflynn is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Anonymous41006
 
Thanks for this!
Bill3
Anonymous42894
Guest
Anonymous42894 has no updates. Edit
 
Posts: n/a
Default Jul 29, 2020 at 10:51 AM
  #27
I believe I redeemed Mother's Day by ending the cycle of generational abuse with my own children. I did not require my kids to cope with my issues, I am there for them, and I certainly never thought to take out my anger and hurt on them. Even before I remembered abusive episodes, I was determined to be a safe, protective, and unconditionally loving mother. This is redemptive.

On Mother's Day, my kids and I used to plant in the garden flowers they got for my gift. Lovely, colorful new life.


However, I rarely share my feelings about my original mother because I find people are even more shocked when the abuser is the maternal unit than when it's a father. And those reactions used to reinforce my feeling of being a freak whose own mother couldn't love her. In fact of course, she was the "unnatural" one. And I am the one who became the first in generations of loving parents. It's humbling. I thank God!
  Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Bill3, Toughcooki
 
Thanks for this!
Bill3, pachyderm, Toughcooki
All times are GMT -5. The time now is 12:53 PM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.



 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.