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majkelowy1
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Trig Jun 13, 2019 at 05:03 PM
  #1
How can I get rid of my polish heritage and destructive behaviours connected with and hate which I received because of random nazism.

I already applied for british passport and send 2 extra arguments to support the application because I will work as more powerful person.
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Smile Jun 16, 2019 at 01:19 PM
  #2
Well... I'm not sure about what you had in mind regarding your Polish heritage. I don't know how one gets rid of one's heritage. Perhaps it's simply a matter of being away from it longer & longer. The longer you are away from it the less influence it has over you? I don't know. That's just a thought.

Destructive behaviors, of course, are something else again. Presumably they are fueled by anger. And anger is something you can work on. Working with a counselor or therapist may be one way to address the anger that is fueling your destructive behaviors. However here are links to 6 articles, from PC's archives. The first, by our host Dr. John Grohol, Psy.D., talks about learning to let go of past hurts. The remaining 5 offer insights into getting anger & hostility under control:

Learning to Let Go of Past Hurts: 5 Ways to Move On

Getting Anger & Hostility Under Control

Tips for Coping With Your Angry Behavior

Tips for Managing Anger

Anger: Cleansing Squall or Hurricane?

https://psychcentral.com/blog/how-to...-work-for-you/

My best wishes to you...

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Default Jun 16, 2019 at 08:14 PM
  #3
I don't think you can truly shed you background but you can learn to disregard it.just because that is what your family of origin chose doesn't mean that is one that you may opt for. it is the same decision I had to make with my family. I do not make with my family. my father made decisions I do not accept as truth. i.f somehpw I will come in to $$ my first action will be to go to Auschwitz and make peace for my fathers actions. I live my ;life in the exact opposite of my fathers. it is the best I can do. I can ot erase his actions but I can make peace with it .
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Default Jun 18, 2019 at 01:47 PM
  #4
Like resurgam, I've been working hard at distancing myself from damaging family members and all of the hurt and confusion they sowed in my life. In my case, it took an awfully long time to realize I needed to do this. But once I was able to start this process (consciously making the decision to choose my own way to "be"), I felt better.

Getting over past hurts, and the damage they can do, can take awhile. But once you begin, it only gets better. I've been working on these things for 20 years now, and I'm still having "a-ha" moments, where I grasp the connection between a certain feeling deeply instilled in me, and the moment it was probably formed.

It really wasn't me, being "too sensitive", or, "too emotional". My feelings were legitimate...and truth be told, theirs were not, and were often aimed at achieving small power trips, all the way to manipulating individual's behavior through fear and a kind of forced type of respect. (But it was not genuine or properly earned.)

Gaining these insights is very therapeutic, and most importantly, they give me the courage to continue.

Stay strong. Stay true to yourself. Good luck with your journey!
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