Two years later I'm still reliving it Trigger warning

I was sexually coerced , dubbed into acts with a person I barely knew . I was in a bad state of mind from a recent sort of breakup with a older guy who was just apparently using me cause he was lonely and went back to his ex, my emotionally abusive sister . I went on trip with said person not really thinking about what was about to happen. I justified in my mind it was ok cause the person liked me even loved me . The only saving grace was he didn't exactly rape me in the true sense of it. I trusted people and they turned on me and tried to destroy me. Two years later I'm in a relationship that's great but because of lack of sleep its effecting my relationship as my boyfriend is worried about me and my lack of sleep. I get arm pain, a pressure in my pelvic area at night and now my hart races and I start sweating. I'm afraid of losing my boyfriend cause of these issues . He's been wonderful to me and I know it isn't easy on him . Just needing some moral support and tips on how to sleep without these issues.

Well... at the risk of suggesting the obvious...I would think what perhaps is needed here is for you to work through the traumatic experience you had, & what it has done to you, with the help of a mental health therapist preferably one who is experienced in working with survivors of sexual abuse / assault. (Perhaps you are?)

You wrote "he didn't exactly rape me in the true sense of it." But that doesn't mean you weren't traumatized. You wrote the experience you had is affecting your sleep. And that, in turn, is affecting your current relationship. There are certainly lots of articles on the internet on how to get a good night's sleep. There are several of them in PC's archives. (See below.) But at least my personal non-professional perspective would be that, while following some of those kinds of tips is certainly worthwhile, it's really not getting at the root of the problem here. So I hope, if you're not already taking steps to resolve what the trauma you experienced did to you, that you will.

Here are links to 9 articles, from PC's archives, that (hopefully) may be of some help: 1 on the subject of PTSD, 3 related to sexual assault, & 5 on how to get a good night's sleep:

Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) | Psych Central

Sexual Assault: What Is It? How to Empower Recovery for Survivors

Dealing with Sexual Trauma: 3 Phases | Relationship Corner

Coping with Flashbacks

9 Tips for A Good Night's Sleep

https://psychcentral.com/blog/how-to...ure-depressed/

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/weigh...dium=popular17

https://psychcentral.com/lib/putting...dium=popular17

https://psychcentral.com/lib/the-fir...ise-you/?all=1

My best wishes to you...

Have you though about getting in touch with a rape crisis? Someone who could give you coping skills for the emotions. Then go to your doctor about the physical pain you are in.