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Newly Joined
Member Since Jun 2020
Location: Allentown
Posts: 2
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Jun 19, 2020 at 07:04 AM
#1
One of my teen daughters was molested by her cousin about same age last year. My sis-in-law in total denial. In fact, the whole part of my nephew's family does not believe my child. Any family out there ever have to deal with the backlash from the family divisions that transpired after their child spoke up. It feels like relationship grief when a whole part of your family has disowned your family because your child spoke up and said the truth.
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 Abusedbysister, Bill3, MsLady
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 Abusedbysister, Bill3, Skeezyks
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Disreputable Old Troll
Member Since Oct 2015
Location: The Star of the North
Posts: 32,762
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Jun 19, 2020 at 01:24 PM
#2
I haven't had an experience such as this myself. (Perhaps there will be other PC members who will have experiences they can share though.) In the meantime, here are links to 8 articles, from Psych Central's archives, that (hopefully) may be of some help:
Victim Shaming and Blaming 7 Ways Family Members Re-victimize Sexual Abuse Survivors Healing from Sexual Assault Sexual Assault: What Is It? How to Empower Recovery for Survivors Dealing with Sexual Trauma: 3 Phases https://blogs.psychcentral.com/careg...trauma-victim/ https://psychcentral.com/lib/coping-...dium=popular17 https://blogs.psychcentral.com/imper...tional-wounds/ My best wishes to you & your daughter... 
__________________ "I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last) |
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Iloivar
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Poohbah
Member Since Mar 2020
Location: Earth
Posts: 1,143
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Jun 19, 2020 at 02:27 PM
#3
I'm sorry you're going through this and I can relate.
How close have you been with your sibling? Is there a way the two of you can seek counseling together? If there wasn't an attachment in this relationship to begin with, it'll be more difficult to have her open up about this. She's in denial because this is her "baby" and denial is part of grieving. She needs time to accept this truth about her son. I don't doubt part of her denial has something to do with her concerns about what "she's" done wrong that her child would even do this. Explain to your daughter that her cousin crossed boundaries and acted in ways that was wrong. It is not her fault and that his actions are even illegal. Due to the seriousness of his actions, it's very difficult for family members to accept this as part of their reality. Hopefully they'll come around but it will take time. Please tell your daughter their denial is a common response and with support, she will get the support she needs. |
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Iloivar
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