Processing trauma from parents

I am one of those cliches where I always assumed that I didn't have trauma or I wasn't in a bad place because other people have it worse. It wasn't until I met one of my friends that I realized I was wrong. They started pointing out things my parents did that they were shocked about. These things include: my mom blowing up on me if I ask to go somewhere more than once in a week, telling my mom about my feelings and her calling me sensitive or overriding it with her problems and telling me about how they are worse, her making me practically raise my siblings because she has been in college for almost all of my life, not letting me get in my side of the story or allowing me to explain myself because its talking back & they are right. The list is crazy long. I also think I have trauma from issues with my real dad. He struggled with mental illnesses and he was a druggie who was in and out of prison so he was barely in my life. However, when he was out of prison he always made an effort to get in touch with me. My mom began insulting him in front of me, making fun of him and his side of the family, calling my grandma who I love a witch. This lady fed me so much hatred about my dad that I turned on him. I lashed out on him and said I never wanted to talk to or see him again. Then he died on my 13 or 14th birthday. Yall i wish with all my heart that i was making this up. It isnt until now that im realizing how crazy it sounds. There is a lot more to unpack but that is what is on my mind right now. i know i will most definitely need therapy when i get older and can pay for it myself. OH also whenever i was diagnosed with general anxiety disorder and depression i would have crying fits and she told me i was doing it for attention. Literally i could list so many other things. I guess I just want to feel like someone is listening to me out there. Thats all. I dont have many people to talk to, especial not family.

Thanks for sharing your concerns, here on PC, plantadmirer. I'm sorry you have had to endure so much hardship. Hopefully being here on PC can be of some comfort & support.

Here are links to 5 articles, from PC's archives, that (hopefully) may be of some help on the subject of healing your inner child:

Healing Your Inner Child

6 Steps to Help Heal Your Inner Child

3 Therapies to Heal Your Wounded Inner Child

How I Healed My Inner Child

Healing My Inner Child