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Seqoya
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Default Aug 10, 2020 at 12:00 AM
  #1
I was abused as a child mentally, physically and sexually by my former step-father. But the statute of limitations is up. He has also abused others that I know of before me. His stepdaughters and step son from his first marriage. (The stepson wasn't abused sexually)

What is on my mind a lot right now is a man I was in a relationship with that sexually assaulted me. I have a protection order against him and have stood up for myself finally. But he has appealed it so one of the presiding Judges of the court house will hear the appeal but that's two more months away and I get stressed about it.

The revision hearing (Appeal) was supposed to be in July but he failed to submit some things that he needed to so that hearing was cancelled and later rescheduled when he got the transcripts from the original hearing submitted by his second lawyer. So now I have to wait longer instead of getting it over with. The Protection Order is in place for now.

I am concerned as to why he is fighting so hard when he claims that he has no desire to have contact with me again. He even insists that multiple experts are necessary to evaluate me because of my mental health. This is never done for civil protection orders, this is not a criminal trial and will not go on his criminal record unless he violates the order and is convicted of that. He has lied in his written statements and verbal testimony for the original hearing including when he contacted me last.

We have not been in a relationship since 2018 but I have had problems with him this year.

He has even said that my religion is the problem causing me guilt for being with him sexually.

A supervising detective for a unit where I live refused to have my case investigated because he doesn't feel that what happened is criminal and he blames my accusations on my mental health and religion because he talked to my abuser and he did not discuss these issues with me or ask me. The detective had an attitude about my religion from the moment I told him how I feel about sex before marriage and the detective said that I didn't want a particular sex act that happened because of my religion even after I corrected him.

The above shows bias and prejudice on the detective's part and he questioned my motives in reporting all after I worked up the courage to report it.

I also have a serious medical issue for which I'm having surgery soon. This is all weighing on my mind at the same time.

My faith and mental health and medical treatment is keeping me going.

Well, I just thought that I would share.
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Default Aug 11, 2020 at 11:44 PM
  #2
Thank you for sharing. I can't imagine how stressful this is but I do want to say congratulations on standing up for yourself. Keep reaching out here and sharing if it helps

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Thumbs down Aug 13, 2020 at 06:56 PM
  #3
Quote:
Originally Posted by Seqoya View Post
I was abused as a child mentally, physically and sexually by my former step-father. But the statute of limitations is up. He has also abused others that I know of before me. His stepdaughters and step son from his first marriage. (The stepson wasn't abused sexually)

What is on my mind a lot right now is a man I was in a relationship with that sexually assaulted me. I have a protection order against him and have stood up for myself finally. But he has appealed it so one of the presiding Judges of the court house will hear the appeal but that's two more months away and I get stressed about it.

The revision hearing (Appeal) was supposed to be in July but he failed to submit some things that he needed to so that hearing was cancelled and later rescheduled when he got the transcripts from the original hearing submitted by his second lawyer. So now I have to wait longer instead of getting it over with. The Protection Order is in place for now.

I am concerned as to why he is fighting so hard when he claims that he has no desire to have contact with me again. He even insists that multiple experts are necessary to evaluate me because of my mental health. This is never done for civil protection orders, this is not a criminal trial and will not go on his criminal record unless he violates the order and is convicted of that. He has lied in his written statements and verbal testimony for the original hearing including when he contacted me last.

We have not been in a relationship since 2018 but I have had problems with him this year.

He has even said that my religion is the problem causing me guilt for being with him sexually.

A supervising detective for a unit where I live refused to have my case investigated because he doesn't feel that what happened is criminal and he blames my accusations on my mental health and religion because he talked to my abuser and he did not discuss these issues with me or ask me. The detective had an attitude about my religion from the moment I told him how I feel about sex before marriage and the detective said that I didn't want a particular sex act that happened because of my religion even after I corrected him.

The above shows bias and prejudice on the detective's part and he questioned my motives in reporting all after I worked up the courage to report it.

I also have a serious medical issue for which I'm having surgery soon. This is all weighing on my mind at the same time.

My faith and mental health and medical treatment is keeping me going.

Well, I just thought that I would share.
I'm sorry that happened to you. Sound like my sister friend who is mentally ill, sexual abuse her own kids and their friends.
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Default Aug 17, 2020 at 03:27 AM
  #4
This is so tough, I really feel for you. I'm sorry you went through these horrible experiences. Good for you for pursuing legal action and standing up for yourself. No matter what he or that detective might be saying about it. Being insensitive about your religious beliefs and customs looks bad on their part. I know this is really stressful, with everything going on. But please stay strong. Keep turning to your spirituality, and friends for support. I think you can make it through this.
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Default Oct 14, 2020 at 06:28 AM
  #5
I am feeling some relief now. The Protection Order was upheld last week.
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