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Old 01-24-2020, 06:51 AM   #1
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Confused Confusing mixed feelings (sort of a vent but help would be appreciated)

Decided to post it here, what with being a teenager and not knowing where else to post it.

So, for the past week or so, I've been feeling unusually happy. Like, really happy and motivated. I have literally got so much stuff done. I finally decided on what to spend my christmas amazon vouchers on and am hoping to buy my first proper drawing tablet tomorrow. It's cheap, but that's part of why it's so great.

So of course my brain has to ruin it. Especially with the whole disease outbreak thing going on, my anxiety is being way more of a problem than it was a while ago. I can't stop worrying about the end of the world and dying horribly.

Also, being a serial hypochondriac, my brain is jumping to conclusions that I'm not just more happy and motivated than usual, that it's hypomania or something. This of course gives me more anxiety because for the past few years I've been stuck in a depression so I'm not quite sure how happy and motivated is supposed to be normal for me.

All in all, I'm just very confused and the two different feelings together are rather awkward and I don't quite know what to think of it.

Edit: I just thought of a good way to describe how I'm feeling. It's like I've had a ton of caffeine and sugar, but I haven't had any.
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Old 01-24-2020, 11:39 AM   #2
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Default Re: Confusing mixed feelings (sort of a vent but help would be appreciated)

Hi ConfusedBench,

I'm very sorry that you are being troubled by ambivalent thoughts and feelings.

I wish I had some insights to share on the situation you describe, but sadly I don't. I've often experienced ambivalent thoughts and feelings and find that depression intensifies them.

Hopefully others here will have something helpful to share with you.

It is so difficult to be alone with unwelcome feelings. You deserve a life where you can experience peace and joy of living! -- Yaowen
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