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Old 02-19-2019, 09:17 AM #1
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Default Are men obsolete?

I see the men's forum has a thread about this topic, and since we aren't supposed to post there, I'm starting a thread here.

I hope the stereotypical chest-beating, emotionally clueless man is becoming obsolete, but I sure wouldn't want to live in a world without men.

What are your thoughts?
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Old 02-19-2019, 10:41 AM #2
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I am so glad you started this as I did post yesterday and deleted it before I was skeward. The misogynistic word-play and aggressive rage undertones in that thread really concern me. You can see it and hear it in the incel forums but I do not know why it is given space here. The idea that "women are destroying society and the family" is ridiculous and is propagated by egotistical, in secure men. They feel that they are entitled to sex and relationships with women and entitled to define what women are good for and what they do. Then they throw in "motherhood is the hardest job" as some backhanded compliment.
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Old 02-19-2019, 11:17 AM #3
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Default Are men obsolete?

Fortunately I do not live with or associate with any misogynist men. Certainly they are out there. But there are plenty of good men out there too and their personalities and interests range and vary as much as women’s. There’s good and bad in all walks of life. There are plenty of women I wouldn’t want to associate with either. Personally, I don’t think it’s fair... Or right... to insult, shame, criticize or stereotype either gender.
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Old 02-19-2019, 11:22 AM #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sisabel View Post
Fortunately I do not live with or associate with any misogynist men. Certainly they are out there. But there are plenty of good men out there too and their personalities and interests range and vary as much as women’s. There’s good and bad in all walks of life. There are plenty of women I wouldn’t want to associate with either. Personally, I don’t think it’s fair... Or right... to insult, shame, criticize or stereotype either gender.
I agree with you but Travelinglady and I are referring to a specific thread in the men's section.
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Old 02-20-2019, 07:45 AM #5
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Now I've got to go check that out. :\
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Old 02-20-2019, 07:57 AM #6
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Well...I think that I recall the line of reasoning from the OP, at that point in time. There was the point about radical feminism. I would guess the 3rd wave of feminism where I'm somewhere in the 2nd wave of equinamity. During the anti harassment/discrimination era. I disagree that raising kids isn't the hardest role in the world. I get the point about breaking up the nuclear family but I also get the point about sticking women barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen and at the will of a husband that may or may not be capable of doing right by the family.
As a mother of sons I do not want to raise them into a culture that says that they are not employable nor worthy because of their gender but I do not feel like we as a society are even heading in that direction. They do hold doors for me and others they do use manners and know that mom can not only use a screwdriver but can be feminine all at the same time.
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Old 02-20-2019, 02:45 PM #7
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Yes, I had a bit of that stuff thrown at me on chat... myself and another woman left the chatroom. Partly I think that both women and men can go through phases of blaming the other gender, or different races, or however you frame your identify you can blame the other person... and there isn't much that can be said or done until you take back responsibility. It's a personal working through.


I feel comforted by SarahSweets and TravellingLady commenting.


I find a lot lacking in men in my city (women too). I want to meet people with some depth and sense of responsibility. Actually both men and women are super obsessed with looks, but most people actually live like robots - completely exhausted by the cost of their commute and their work. They have to find value somewhere - and looks is what the shops offer them.


I'm hoping to move to somewhere that people can be entrepreneurs or craftspeople. That takes a different kind of attitude and person. I want to be encouraged to take positive action in life. I want men who take action on their spirituality, their emotional life, their material life, their community life - and who encourage me to do likewise.


So that's my rant.
PC seems to allow quite a lot of leeway on some things and no leeway on others, but every social group has to decide where to set limits. No worries, just glad to know women can share their views too.


I don't feel the need to tub-thump every time some man acts aggressive, and that's a measure of feeling secure.


Saidso

P.S. My comment about identity and blaming may be specific to where I live, and because someone drew my attention to a book about how this pans out on social media. Identity... when it becomes a cover for acting badly rather than coming from being valued by your peers, and from gratitude.
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Old 02-20-2019, 09:52 PM #8
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I don't believe so.
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Old 02-20-2019, 11:59 PM #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by healingme4me View Post
Now I've got to go check that out. :\
Me too. I usually skip over the men's forum, but after reading this thread, I went there to check it out.

It seems like people who have had bad experiences with women are just venting.
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Old 02-21-2019, 07:37 AM #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ennie View Post
Me too. I usually skip over the men's forum, but after reading this thread, I went there to check it out.

It seems like people who have had bad experiences with women are just venting.
I usually skip by their forum, as well. I agree about venting. Or being exposed to the rantings of women who've themselves had poor experiences with men? Feeding into a viscious cycle of inundating the 'net.

I'm remain in the mindset of equinamity. Embracing differences with valueing one another.

Life's too goshdarn short for making enemies/villifying based upon gender.
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