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LadyShadow
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Default Jan 05, 2020 at 12:52 PM
  #281
I have been a rollercoaster of emotion - up, down, up and then down again. I feel like I can't break this cycle. The holidays were hard for me because me and my sister aren't talking, and my boyfriend is away in rehab. I think it's all piling up on me and I feel like I might break.

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Default Jan 07, 2020 at 04:50 AM
  #282
here is my first check in of 2020.

and I have to say, the ddepression is stronger than ever

new year's eve was spent sat in my room thinking about what a mess the past 12 months have been (so like every year), and every day since, I have just been hoping, and praying, for

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Default Jan 07, 2020 at 04:51 AM
  #283
I love how I'm asked: so what do you want from 2020

and my answer is nothing

that is how it is
 
 
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Default Jan 07, 2020 at 05:39 AM
  #284
@raging vortex, I'm so sorry you're hurting. I hope things get better for you. Hang in there. Do you have a therapist you can talk to? Do you think it a good idea to call your pdoc? I can relate. I have felt the same way just recently. I talked with my online T about it. It really helped me. And there are books on Amazon that are helpful too. Sending good thoughts your way.

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Default Jan 07, 2020 at 05:47 AM
  #285
Today I am fine. I'm not sure if I got enough sleep last night. I guess if I'm tired later, I'll just take a long nap. Hope everyone is doing well.

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Default Jan 07, 2020 at 08:16 PM
  #286
My motto right now for 2020 is: "Just focus on what you can control, Blanche." There's so much out of my control. But, if I distract myself with what I can't control, that will detract me from focusing on the tangibles that I can control.

My depression is situational. My anxiety is biological and situational. My mindset is: "Don't panic. Ok, panic a little. Now go focus on a,b,c, and d..."
 
 
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Default Jan 08, 2020 at 01:38 PM
  #287
@raging vortex and everyone struggling- I'm sorry to hear you are having a rough time.

I'm doing alright. I've been using some dating sites but haven't met anyone decent yet but I'm trying to stay hopeful.
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Default Jan 08, 2020 at 03:15 PM
  #288
I'm not feeling well today. I'm tired and I'm dizzy. I'm almost nauseous. But my blood sugar is fine. I see my GP tomorrow. Maybe she can run some tests.

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Default Jan 09, 2020 at 06:17 PM
  #289
impatiently awaiting the arrival of "aunt flo" lol Hey! if I can't post it here without shame, where can I??
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Default Jan 10, 2020 at 12:37 AM
  #290
I saw my GP yesterday. It was a very stressful day. I was depressed and upset almost all day long. But important thing is that I got my appointment out of the way. My GP thinks I just need to take benadryl for sinuses. So I'll give it a try. Today I will try to have a brighter day. I will isolate. I'm finding that when I try to socialize, I just get hurt. So I'm going to withdraw.

Hope everyone has a good Friday!

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Default Jan 10, 2020 at 05:16 AM
  #291
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Originally Posted by giddykitty View Post
impatiently awaiting the arrival of "aunt flo" lol Hey! if I can't post it here without shame, where can I??
everyone's favorite relative

not... I don't like her much. lol
 
 
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Default Jan 10, 2020 at 05:21 AM
  #292
I just got out the shower.

and I am in a lot of back pain

ugg

not the best way to start a friday
 
 
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Default Jan 10, 2020 at 06:19 AM
  #293
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Originally Posted by raging vortex View Post
I just got out the shower.

and I am in a lot of back pain

ugg

not the best way to start a friday
Sorry you're in pain. I hope your Friday gets better. And may you have a nice weekend as well.

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Default Jan 16, 2020 at 08:03 PM
  #294
I've been okay. I am attempting online dating but has been beyond terrible which is kind of depressing. Otherwise I'm alright.
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Default Jan 17, 2020 at 09:36 PM
  #295
I am home from the hospital. I've been relaxing with games and food.

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Default Jan 18, 2020 at 07:07 PM
  #296
@Deilla I'm glad you are home. How are you feeling? Games and food sound nice.

My day was pretty good. I spent a good amount of time today talking to some friends which was nice.
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Default Jan 18, 2020 at 07:25 PM
  #297
@88Butterfly88, thank you! I feel Okay today. I've been keeping myself busy. I did an online puzzle today. It was relaxing. And any time I started ruminating, I applied a new skill I learned in the hospital.

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Default Jan 18, 2020 at 07:43 PM
  #298
@Deilla I'm glad you are keeping yourself busy and that you learned a new skill.
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Default Jan 20, 2020 at 10:59 PM
  #299
I'm upset that my TSH levels are so low. The roller coaster of rotating doses between 112 to 125 puts me on edge because of the longterm impact on my heart and lungs and digestive system etc. Well, my whole body suffers. My levels are so low today, my endo wants to increase me to 125 again but I told him I wouldn't do it unless I could rotate the doses every other day. I wish I had never started thyroid hormone.
 
 
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Default Jan 22, 2020 at 02:01 AM
  #300
I'm doing Okay. Had to deal with a stressful situation yesterday. Hoping for a better day today. I hope everyone is well!

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