Last Chance

LiteraryLark · Nov 10, 2019 at 04:22 AM

I'm really depressed. I cannot even count how many jobs I've held, and not one of them I was in the least bit good at. At my current job, I haven't been there 60 days and I've already been given a final warning. I'm just not a good fit. The biggest issue is that I'm not learning any of the skills. And it's a pretty basic minimum wage job meant for teenagers which is making me feel worse that I, a straight A honor roll student with a very high position at the school cannot handle a teenage entry level position. It's really bringing me down. I don't know what else to do. It's like I'm not meant to work at all, because in almost every job I've received write ups and warnings and terminations. It's very discouraging because for just once I'd like to hold down a job. I've never held a job more than 6 months and that really bothers me. My current boss told me I am overworked from school and am not focusing. I can't shut my brain off from school and I don't know what to do. I feel like a failure.

Lilly2 · Nov 10, 2019 at 08:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LiteraryLark

I'm really depressed. I cannot even count how many jobs I've held, and not one of them I was in the least bit good at. At my current job, I haven't been there 60 days and I've already been given a final warning. I'm just not a good fit. The biggest issue is that I'm not learning any of the skills. And it's a pretty basic minimum wage job meant for teenagers which is making me feel worse that I, a straight A honor roll student with a very high position at the school cannot handle a teenage entry level position. It's really bringing me down. I don't know what else to do. It's like I'm not meant to work at all, because in almost every job I've received write ups and warnings and terminations. It's very discouraging because for just once I'd like to hold down a job. I've never held a job more than 6 months and that really bothers me. My current boss told me I am overworked from school and am not focusing. I can't shut my brain off from school and I don't know what to do. I feel like a failure.

@LiteraryLark (((safe hugs)))

You're not a failure at all. I, too, aced all my courses, won awards, was the chapter president of an honor society, was the secretary for three different honor societies, and did honors-level work in college - and I still, at the age of 45, cannot hold down full-time work let alone part-time work. I'd absolutely die if I had to stand on my feet all day in a retail job (which I did part-time about 3 decades ago as a teenager), and I didn't do so well. Throughout my life, I wondered why my insomnia and chronic fatigue and PTSD and (later, when I was diagnosed properly) DID were affecting my ability to work when I could do so well in school settings. Work is different, it just is. It's not that you've failed, though we can all learn from failure, as I've failed in school but wound up getting A's whenever I learned from failure and pressed myself forward. However, not being able to perform on the job is NOT a failure. Instead, it's showing you that the job is not a good fit for you. Another type of job might be a better fit, especially if you have trouble with customer-service-type jobs, engaging with a bunch of different people, or being overloaded with sensorimotor stimulants such as constant sounds, many different job duties, etc.

You might get paid more money and feel more comfortable in other settings, such as working for a library, working in a research-like setting, working as a secretary/administrative assistant, or working from home. There are many other jobs out there. Just because there are minimum-wage jobs with low skill requirements does not mean that those jobs are stress-free or easy; in fact, those jobs (more power to the workers!) involve a lot of extroversion, multitasking, physical agility, and more. They're far from easy, even if the pay is minimal.

It's true that some "desk jobs" or jobs that require minimal engagement with people wind up paying a little more than minimum-wage jobs, and they might be easier to obtain.

There are ways you can get your foot into the door with one of those "desk" jobs, especially if you did well in school. It's not easy to find entry-level jobs without references, but if a former teacher and/or professor could serve as referees for you, you could reformulate your resume to find a different line of work. Sometimes colleges offer their alumni career planning and help, so if you were in college, that is one resource you can network with. Also, word-of-mouth goes a long way, so if you have fellow alumni peers you can speak with, they might be able to find you work or even hire you if they are in management.

Hang in there.

What kind of studying did you do? Were you in college or in high school? What did you enjoy studying while in college or high school? Do you have mobility problems, etc.? What diagnoses do you have (both physical and mental)? Maybe answering some of these questions (in private or on the boards here) might help you to reassess your goals for employment.

I had to do that recently. I did great work as an undergrad, but there is no way I was going into certain jobs or careers.

And when "vocational rehabilitation" gets in the way of my own goals for the sake of pushing clients to get easy-to-hire (but not easy) minimum-wage jobs, it does a disservice to their clients who have the aptitude for something more fitting to their needs and desires. Such programs may help, but in some ways, they might not.

If a program isn't helping, and if a job isn't a good fit, I'd try looking elsewhere for help to find work that is better suited to your needs.

Perhaps we can help you online here to figure out what it is you like to do and feel comfortable with. Only you can truly answer that, but we can ask you some questions that might spark new ideas within yourself, and demonstrate your awesome ability to problem-solve this very tough situation.

(((safe hugs)))

Discombobulated · Nov 10, 2019 at 02:30 PM

Excellent posting from Lilly2.

I second all of that. Entry level/min wage does not always equal easy - so definitely don't beat yourself up!

It sounds to me like you have tried, and worked hard, just not found a place where you feel right yet. It isn't easy, I am sure many can identify- I know I can.

Hugs!

divine1966 · Nov 10, 2019 at 05:41 PM

If you are full time student, could you not work for awhile at all? Take a loan? Ask your parents for help? Not everyone can work and go to school. It might be too much

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Discombobulated Grand Magnate Member Since Oct 2019 Location: UK Posts: 4,684 (SuperPoster!) 4 11.6k hugs given	Nov 10, 2019 at 02:30 PM #3 Excellent posting from Lilly2. I second all of that. Entry level/min wage does not always equal easy - so definitely don't beat yourself up! It sounds to me like you have tried, and worked hard, just not found a place where you feel right yet. It isn't easy, I am sure many can identify- I know I can. Hugs!
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divine1966 Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Dec 2014 Location: US Posts: 22,367 (SuperPoster!) 9 1,277 hugs given	Nov 10, 2019 at 05:41 PM #4 If you are full time student, could you not work for awhile at all? Take a loan? Ask your parents for help? Not everyone can work and go to school. It might be too much
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