Losing my job because of Coronavirus

After a long therapeutic process I was doing well enough to try and finally look for a job. It was my first job after graduating and being on a forced hiatus due to my deteriorating mental health. It was a part time job in a shoe shop. I only worked there for 1 month and 1 week before Coronavirus spred out in Italy. I was left at home and started to be in quarantine as anyone else. I was just an intern but I was relying on that money to move to England as soon as possible. I couldnt handle a full time job due to my anxiety and I was very sensitive to critiques coming from my manager. But I was making my way through it. I loved being around customers and received lots of compliments.

Now Ive just been told that once the shop will reopen there might be some layoffs. And Im sure that being an intern the person that will be sacked will be me.

I worked so hard to get this job, I dont want to go back to doing nothing apart from wallowing in my depression and anxiety. I feel like all my improvements were in vain and now I will once more have to explain why I have a gap in my curriculum to possible future employers. Not to mention that it will take at least 6 months to find another job because the economy is doing so bad that no one will hire me now.

I feel so down and cant push myself to do anything. I was enjoying my hobbies during this quarantine but now I feel like I dont want to do anything at all. I am scared that I might go back to how I felt when I was at home, jobless and depressed. My therapist said we will discuss it but I dont know what she might say that will make it better. Due to the virus my plan of moving to England will also be postponed and that was the only real goal I had that I know will make me feel happy.

Sorry I just wanted to share my experience and Im sure many of you are going through the same situation now

I’m sorry you’re going through this after finally getting your first job. You must feel everything has moved backwards, but you did improve and get the job.

It is possible the shop will keep you because you did receive compliments and you might cost them less than others. Another possibility is the manager may want to hire you back at a later time when they start selling again. I don't know. The future is not easy to predict.

If you do end up with a gap in your curriculum, you can explain it as a result of the virus. I feel many people are going to have gaps from this and employers will understand it.

During this time, I feel like we aren't reliving past anxieties. This is completely new. We are going forward through new anxieties and have to find our way through this unknown time.

I hope you keep your job and get to England as you planned.

Thank you so much for your comment, I feel like you understood my situation perfectly. I felt like I was going to be sacked so Ive been pretty restless and anxious recently. I definitely worry that all of my improvements will be lost and I will be back to the beginning, dealing with my anxiety again. I had gotten to a pretty good place mental health wise and I cant see it getting good again anytime soon.

I am having a difficult time feeling motivated to do things too. Last night, I was feeling down and was just sitting in my thoughts doing nothing. I finally decided to watch a series of videos on writing that I had discovered a few weeks ago since I want to return to writing again. Watching those did help redirect my mind. I felt much better afterwards. I might make a list of things to do when I am feeling unmotivated to do anything.

This might be helpful to you. A therapist gave me this article link to help me with worry. It seems to have good ideas. I guess I did tip 4 last night: Interrupt the worry cycle.

The article is really interesting! Thank you so much!