People not truly liking where they work

I've wondered if most people really don't like working at the places they work at. They may like it at first but then it grows on them and they eventually dislike where they work, especially if they see it as a toxic work environment. The biggest indication that this seems to be the case is due to the fact that people appear to have no problem talking crap about their place of employment and even their coworkers with friends or family outside of work but no one will ever divulge their personal feelings to their coworkers which is understandable.

Even though work life and social life should be kept secret, usually people will not keep their work problems to themselves when they are with friends and family. Not saying that you should open up to coworkers or tell them personal stuff. I don't think most coworkers are to be trusted and they shouldn't know personal stuff. Even the most genuine coworkers who mean well can still screw up and spill the beans.

But the fact that people will abide by the rules and keep their personal life out of work, yet they have no trouble bringing their work problems home with them makes me wonder how much people truly value their jobs. I'm sure there are exceptions but I think most people work at their jobs for the paycheck. I think we all do this. Do you think most people just work for the paycheck? Do you think most work environments are toxic? Just wondering what you guys thought.

And it doesn't even have to be outside of work. Coworkers can even talk bad about the job with each other, which is a bad idea. I have a coworker that does that. She hates working there and she is not afraid to tell how she feels about the job while working. She even stated that she has absolutely no respect for the job. That is fine if she feels that way, but I think saying that stuff out loud is a bad idea and it sends a message that she doesn't care if she is putting herself in danger of losing her job. I think it is unprofessional and in a way, just asking to be fired. I don't tell my coworkers how I feel. I don't want that to get back to me and hurt me later on. I want to get a new job but my coworkers don't need to know how I feel. These kinds of behavior make me wonder how much people truly value their jobs.

Sometimes people just blow steam and vent about work to make their life easier under stress or bond with others. I love my job and my place of employment. I pretty much liked every major place of employment I had but it doesn’t mean I don’t complain sometimes. Everyone does. It doesn’t mean anything. People complain about their kids, doesn’t mean they’d rather not have them or have different kids. They just blow steam, especially under stress.

Yeah makes sense. Yeah everyone does it.

I value having my job and like the work at times, but I don't like the company where I work. They have treated employees and customers badly in the past and it doesn't make me proud to work there. I can't say it is toxic...it is more that they don't treat people fair.

I don't open up to most people about where I work or talk bad about it. I stay because there are positives, but I keep thinking about leaving if I find the right opportunity. I think it helps your wellbeing to work somewhere that you like and feel proud to be a part of.

I think people can value the fact they have a job, but still complain about it if they don't actually like where they work.

People shouldn't really talk about not liking their job while at work though. It creates a more negative atmosphere for the coworkers who have to hear about it. I can see if everyone is miserable, then that's one thing. But if it's just one or two people complaining a lot, it creates negative energy.

There's a lot of toxic work environments out there for sure. And most people I've run across do not like their jobs. It's very hard to find a healthy work environment with a strong management team.

I totally agree. I feel the same way about my work. I like it and tolerate it enough to stay, but once I find a better place, I’m going to take that job.

Yeah I totally agree. No place is perfect. And yeah complaining about the job while at work is not a good idea. It is negative and could even lead to dismissal if the wrong person hears it.

I think the only times it's acceptable is when you find a true confidante and if that person has complaints too, then the two of you can commiserate together. I had that situation in one job - actually, it was with two others on my larger team and the three of us would eat lunch together and would complain about our boss. It was cathartic. So, I think it's OK under certain circumstances only. But I agree with you that if it gets to the wrong person, it could be a bad situation. And if it's just one person complaining openly to everyone, then that creates a negative situation.

Yeah I agree. One of my coworkers is the only one who openly complains about the job. Even if someone asks how her weekend was, her response is usually her saying it was wonderful because she didn't have to be at such a horrid place. Even though it is really not that bad. No one else responds to those kinds of questions that way. They usually think of something nicer and neutral. Not devulging too much of their personal life but still keeping it positive.

Yes, some coworkers are rude and arrogant there, but it is not so horrible that I feel like I need to quit on the spot to get out. I agree that it is the kind of negativity that hinders the work environment. Sometimes I find myself wishing she would just leave, as rude as that sounds.

Oh dear Lord. Yeah. I had a coworker like that. She spread her negativity around to whomever would listen. She was actually quite toxic to the entire organization. She did leave eventually, and I was sooo relieved! I can understand your sentiments completely. It puts a wet blanket on any enthusiasm or positivity you may feel yourself whenever someone is so negative like that.

Yep exactly. It can be uncomfortable too because if someone is talking so negatively like that to me and the wrong person walks in, it could easily look like I’m engaging in complaining about the job. Glad you no longer have to deal with that coworker. I’m sure it was a relief!

Oh, I know what you mean! That's when you change the subject to something positive, or something totally unrelated to work that is positive. I never gave into that person's negativity. She literally would walk around the office, muttering negative things under her breath!!! It was awful.

That is a good idea. Changing the subject is a good idea. And yeah, your ex coworker sounds awful! If someone hates it so much, they should leave. Glad your coworker left.

Oh yeah... changing the subject or distracting them with something else works! I am no longer working where this coworker worked, but she really infected the whole office badly. What's worse? She is the Human Resources Director's daughter!!! And the HR Director herself would mutter negative things under her breath sometimes while walking by our desks! Terrible!

Wow, that is awful!

We spend half of our waking hours at work. No wonder if people keep talking about their job's problems which are inevitable. As to why people talk to their family and friends about work, and they don't talk to their coworkers about their personal stuff, I think it's because we trust our friends and families, but we are not very close to coworkers to confide to them.

Yeah that makes sense.

Honestly, I think there's always going to be something one doesn't like about their work. Whether it's the commute, your boss, the culture , the pay or the work itself. I think it's a challenge in life to find everything in one job that suits your needs. And in my experience, it's really hard to find great management in a company. I've had some of the worst managers/bosses alive. And your boss can make or break your attitude towards your work in general. I'm 50 years old and have only had 1-2 good bosses in my entire life! I've worked in higher education, large corporations, non profit, small business, family run businesses and in virtual environments. And it's been rare that I've had a great boss. Maybe it's just bad luck for me, I don't know. But I am guessing from what I've seen from others that great bosses are really hard to come by. Your boss (to me) is one of the most important aspects of a job. I've basically hated every job because I've had such terrible bosses.

So, one is very very lucky if they have a great boss, a great company AND a job that they like. To me, that's rare to have.

Yeah I agree. It is very rare to be in a great company. Employers and even coworkers are usually in it for themselves and a paycheck. And I agree that bosses and even coworkers can determine what kind of attitude you have towards the job. All depends on the work environment.

It sure does.

The last time I liked a job was in 2014, and that was a brief position for just eight months. Even that job was hard because it was very high pressured and very stressful. But I liked my boss and coworkers, which made the stress more tolerable.